And, let’s not forget her entourage, minions who are all mini-copies of her. "Mean Girls", are that bunch of self-absorbed girls who rule the school with their popularity, perceived power and wardrobes.
Girls, especially those in high school and college, will always form friendships with like-minded individuals. While some of these groups are formed on the basis of academic achievement or hobbies, there are those driven by the need to be on top of the social hierarchy. One defining purpose of an elusive, much admired "in-group" is that others are left out.
The trait will often show itself in young girls as little as age five. It’s usually manifests in the girl who is the teacher’s pet, the prettiest, the best in class, prefect and often from well-off family. Because of her close connection to power (which in lower primary comes in the form of a teacher), her classmates will tend to do her bidding and she usually has her close group of girls who emulate her.
The trend gets stronger at teenage. According to a 2005 Brigham Young University study, girls as young as three will use peer pressure or manipulation to get what they want. The behaviour ranges from leaving someone out of a game to telling friends not to play with someone.
Experts say relational aggression is more common in girls than boys and peaks in primary school.
Although mostly common in high school where girls are beginning to discover and understand their personalities, the phenomenon takes place at university level. Queen bee
Makena, 21, a medical student at a local university says she knows one such group in her class.
"They treat everyone else like crap and if they notice you are eager to join their group, they will put you through hell and never let you in. Once the queen bee stole the boyfriend of a girl in our class who was talking bad about her. They go out of their way to be mean to others and dress and talk the same. All of them drive, date rich guys, miss class together, eat together and buy clothes in the same shops. So if you do not come from a rich family, you can’t keep up with them," says Makena.
"Recently, I sat behind them in my class and my biro fell and landed near the queen bee. I politely asked her to pick it for me. She sneered then ignored me as her friends burst into laughter. It was like I was not even there," says Makena, shaking her head.
"We had such brainless girls in primary and high school and I never in a million years thought I would find them in campus," she says.
Janice, 23, a business student and former member of such a clique says there is no real friendship in those groups.
"We were five girls and all came from the same high school and when we met in campus, we naturally grouped. We did everything together, had the same sense of style and dated the same types of men. We had our queen bee who was the prettiest among us and the most vocal. We bullied our classmates whenever we felt like and used guys for money. We were really bitchy and every girl probably wished they could be like us. We got invited to the latest parties because our queen bee knew her way around town," says Janice.
According to her, there was just one problem — rivalry and meanness, even to ourselves.
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"Some girls in the crew would steal other’s boyfriends and feel nothing. Despite the fact that we wrecked each other’s relationships,
I never once left. In fact, the only reason we parted ways was because they passed their exams and I’m repeating my last year. Now when I look back, I realise just how stupid we all were," says Janice.Ill intentions
Janice says she is trying to make new friends because according to her, mean girls move on and never look back.
This behaviour has intrigued many and has even inspired books and films. The emotional infrastructure, the mazes, hierarchies and group dynamics are both intriguing and breathtaking. What is most puzzling about these girls is the love-hate relationship with their victims. Their victims are seduced by their appeal and power yet repulsed by their ill intentions.
Clare, is a pretty, well-dressed 22-year-old law student. She doesn’t see anything wrong with belonging to a group.
"For some reason, they tend to do what I tell them to do. I can’t help it. I have a group of friends who are like me. We dress the same, hang together and only date rich guys because — which girl wants a poor guy? We do not talk to everyone in our class. It’s not personal but we just don’t want to be associated with everyone.
Although we have heard whispers of how other girls hate us, none has shown us to the face. We are not mean girls, we just have a standard that not every girl can meet," says Clare.
Naomi James, a counselling psychologist at Oasis Africa says members of such groups usually have low self esteem and lack a strong foundation so they will step on anyone to feel superior.
Naomi believes this kind of class cliques among young people is as a result of a personality disorder known as histrionic personality, which is characterised by excessive emotionality and attention seeking. They will do anything to be viewed as being better than others, including inappropriate seductiveness, which usually begins in early adulthood. These individuals are manipulative, lively, dramatic, enthusiastic, flirtatious, egocentric and self-indulgent.Personality disorder
"People with this disorder are usually able to function at a high level and can be successful socially and professionally. They usually have good social skills but tend to use them to manipulate others in their bid to become the centre of attention. They are very self-centred and rarely show concern for others. In fact, they lack genuine empathy," says Naomi.
According to Naomi, the exact cause of histrionic personality disorder is not known, but many mental health professionals believe both learned and inherited factors play a role in its development.
"The child of a parent with this type of disorder simply repeats learned behaviour. Other environmental factors include a lack of criticism or punishment as a child, unpredictable attention given to a child by his or her parents, all leading to confusion about what types of behaviour earn parental approval," she says.
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