Child defilement: The shame of Kenya

By Ally Jamah

She would never have imagined that his “loving” uncle would one day turn out to be her worst enemy; one who would sexually assault her and leave her physically and emotionally disfigured.

But this was the case for the angelic, 12-year-old girl (name withheld) who resides in Nairobi’s Shauri Moyo area.

The girl, deaf and dumb, was full of joy, playing outside their home, when her uncle who lived in a nearby one-roomed house called her. She obliged.

“I thought he wanted to send me to the shop. When I went to his house, I found him with another man. They forcibly took me to the bed and started doing bad things to me,” she said through a sign language interpreter as tears rolled down her cheeks.

Her mother, a single-parent, had gone to work — selling second hand clothes, while her aunt had gone to buy food from the market.

A neighbour rescued her hours later. Police arrested the two suspects.

When her mother (name withheld) learnt about the incident later, she fainted and was hospitalised for several days.

She confessed to The Standard that she felt responsible for the abuse of her daughter: “I totally failed my child. I should have been there to protect her. Oh my God! I never knew my brother would do this to my child. Oh lord!”

Fend for families

Such shocking incidents of sexual attacks on children have been on the rise especially in urban areas, where traditional moral and religious values appear to be falling apart.

Consequently, child experts have renewed their warning that many parents in Kenya have not woken up to the harsh reality that children are being sexually abused at home by close relatives and neighbours while they (parents) are busy doing other things. “These days many parents are rarely at home, as they go out to fend for their families. But at least they must know that their children are not safe in the hands of relatives or neighbours. Risks of sexual abuse are very high,” warned Dr Philista Onyango, Regional Director of African Network for the Prevention and Protection against Child Abuse and Neglect (Kenya Chapter).

She added: “Many parents are still living in the past imagining that their children are safe as long as they are with their uncles, brothers and even father. Things have changed. Now even uncles and fathers are defiling children.”

Dr Onyango further warns that cases of sexual assault of boys at home and school are also on the rise. Last month, a 50-year-old man was arrested in Thika for allegedly sodomising at least seven primary school children. Studies have shown that the majority of sexual abusers of children are usually close family members and relatives or neighbours.

Teachers and house-helps have also been singled out as likely perpetrators of sexual abuse.

Soiling names

“When a child reports to their parents that uncle X had sexually abused them, they are often dismissed as liars and are even beaten for imagining things and soiling peoples’ good names. Many parents are still asleep regarding sexual abuse,” says

Felicia Mburu, a Policy and Advocacy Officer at Kenya Alliance for Advancement of Children. She says that some children are sexually defiled by their older counterparts (ages 16-22) during play in or outside the home, with parents remaining largely in the dark. “Many Kenyan parents are not really open and friendly to their children. This means that sexually abused children suffer in silence and cannot report the same to them.”