Why Nigerian movies do so well

BY Patrick Kariuki

I have never managed to watch a Nigerian movie to its logical conclusion. It's just so difficult. The acting is outlandish, the accent takes some getting used to and the women...well, the women are interesting, but that’s not what I'm on about.

Nigerian films succeed because they’re authentic.They authentically and faithfully represent Nigerians. At least according to the display I witnessed on Wednesday night.

The flat screen on the wall was showing the game and the three Nigerian chaps seated in front of me were deeply engrossed in the antics of the highly skilled professionals on the field.

They were so quiet it was impossible to determine what side they were on. Actually, it was impossible to know they were Nigerians.

This was great for me because I was more engrossed in the music than the game. A particularly favourite song came on, a Snow Patrol number, which always makes me happy.

Erupted like Vesuvius

Suddenly, the flat screen went off. The three brodas had planted themselves smack in front of it. Of all the TVs in the bar, it was only theirs that went off.

The biggest one, a superbly dressed dude, erupted like Vesuvius, directing his rage at a hapless waiter who had also been watching the same flat screen that went off.

"This is rubbish! Rubbish! I come spend all my money here-o, and now you want to make me leave? This is rubbish!" he raged.

The flat screen came back on. It was just a minor blip. But our West African guests were too passionate about their rage to care. They continued haranguing the waiter and the bartender. Then they stormed out of the place.

A few seconds later, Legendary Ryan Giggs collected a beautiful cross and slid it to lethal Wayne Rooney who didn’t make a mistake; he fired it in off the corner post! Snow Patrol’s Just Say Yes came to a beautiful end. It had all happened in a span of less than three minutes.