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Campus schnorrers!

UREPORT
By KEVIN OJIAMBO | March 12th 2017
“So Kevin, we hear that The Star newspaper has offered you a byline to endeavor your campo-chronicles stories, right?” asked (name in remission) who is among my campus adjoining friends in the group.

“Y-e-a-h,” I responded with a voice that exhibited I wasn’t equipped for any further query or a demand from them because what you don’t know about these campus friends is that when they hear you have a job, majority tends to turn devotions from their parents to you as if you are the CEO of Sportpesa.

This was like a hot seat because I recall earlier I had confided in my good friend concerning the good news, maybe he had informed the rest and all they wanted was to confirm if it was true.

“How much are they paying you?” another one asked. This time I knew I had to give a reasonable reply, I cleared my throat as of that of a gospel preacher and began, “You know studies shows that women rarely tell their age and if so, they lie while men rarely tell their salaries, right?”

Each one found themselves nodding in agreement while their eyes wide open as if they had seen Socrates risen from the dead.

My response totally answered their question but by the looks of their facial expression, they appeared dissatisfied. I couldn’t expound further to evade tumbling into their trap.

The reality is, as a student, never mention to your colleagues that you are working or have a job and if need be, better tell them it’s an internship or charity to dodge listening to their glitches.

Problems such as, Oh sijui I’m broke, mara I have a debt and the debtor is harassing me a lot, my chick is pregnant and I need some cash to add to mine so that she can terminate, my make-up imeisha na sijatumiwa pesa, unaweza nitafutia pia mimi hio kazi the list is endless.

Comrade, I wasn’t there while you looked for all those problems plus I also have mine to resolve!

Worst of all is when it comes to campus chicks! You will be like a god to them as long as you are an earner.

They will give you much respect than they give to their real parents/guardians because they sometimes tend to ignore their obvious “Mom/Dad nimesota” text.

She will always support you in WhatsApp groups whether you are wrong or right even if it means putting you as an MCM every Monday after all, who cares as long as she is sure on the weekend she will be at a party or club somewhere far from the familiar environment she is used to during weekdays.

If you are among those students going through this situation, the best way to overcome this is by playing it cool like the advert of Nivea that you always see regularly on your local channels.

 What I mean is that you should live like the rest of the students and try not to show off the little you have.

 To all university students, remember that we are all here on campus to make our future lives better not to beg from our own contemporaries.
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