Kenyans' Peculiar Habit

It has been globally accepted Kenyans are a peculiar lot. Of their (our) most peculiar habits I have come to notice this one where we tend to sugarcoat things to make them socially acceptable. Just how many times have we elected ‘our person’ so that we can also ‘eat’? Or beg someone to give us an opportunity to ‘eat’?

Corruption and embezzlement christened ‘eat’ makes them less evil, even legal… peculiar, right? Well, that’s not all. Welcome to Kenya the green land where people love tea (both tea the noun and the verb).

When I was a young boy bang was the most evil of all drugs and drunkards were frowned upon in the society. Sex perverts were unheard of and sugar daddies were considered scum. Watching pornography was a capital offense that many committed in private then prayed and repented thereafter.

 HIV/AIDS was the devil himself and just the mention of it made people shimmer. Devil worshiping was something we only heard of in movies as something that was practiced abroad and kids were forced to go to church to prevent them from ever falling into the temptation of even considering worshiping Lucifer.

Fast forward to 2017 and bang has been christened ‘weed’ or ‘tyre’. Bang is now openly smoked all over the country and sold even in churches while it’s less evil counterpart, alcohol, simply called ‘tei’ is drank even by primary school kids. Sex perverts crawled out of the gutters, called themselves ‘mafisi’ and made the act cool and trendy.

Not to be left behind sugar daddies christened themselves ‘sponsors’ and became the new craze in town. Pornography was christened ‘ngwati’ and you are bound to find it being played in matatus. The much feared HIV/AIDS is now simply ‘ukedi’ and it’s no big deal to be infected (HIV wasn’t created for trees, right?). Devil worshiping (now ‘illuminati’) isn’t as despicable now, it’s even trendy.

Not to be left out corporate organizations and government institutions are taking advantage of this peculiar Kenyan habit. Just recently a failed bank changed their name, ‘re-branding’ they called it. I’m sure they will definitely have many new customers sign up to this new bank.

Political parties also ‘re-branding’ is not an alien concept (mostly they just add a hyphen and ‘Kenya’ to their name). Mismanaged government institutions are also usually ‘re-branded’ to restore public confidence, remember the Kenya Anti-Corruption Commission now Ethics and Anti-Corruption Commission or the Electoral Commission of Kenya now Independent Electoral and Boundaries Commission.

This peculiar Kenyan habit is both funny and worrying. With things like terrorist organizations re-branding themselves with cool names (hello ISIS), this habit could ultimately lead to our country’s undoing.

The break in moral fiber leaving many questions on the future of our future generations. But hey, are you a disgraced politician? Or maybe a hopeless romantic rejected by a girl? Or you failed in that important interview? Don’t fret, just find yourself a cool name and try again… This is Kenya!