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By Josephine Gikaru | Dec 5th 2016 | 3 min read

Has anyone ever misjudged you? You know someone thinking of in a way that you are not…like holding the exact opposite idea of who you are. Well that has happened to me more often than not, much worse negatively. Every time this happens I always console myself quoting the saying that looks sure are deceiving. In my many cases of being misjudged am quite sure that I lose a friend not one but many but looking at it from the other side of the coin so many lose friends.

On being asked to describe myself, then I would use simple yet very precise words to ensure that I make myself known. I would not only describe my physical self but also the inner me given ample time. Touching on all the details I would ensure that my description is vivid enough. Getting to understand an individual is very important. The understanding should therefore not be preceded by judgment but rather an open mind. Prejudging would only bar you from seeing that which you ought to.

If you initially get to understand a person’s character their perspectives on life and others aspects that you deem important then you know them. It is only then that you would be a good judge of character. This understanding of the other person enables us to either stay or leave. Through which the birds of a feather are formed. It should always be the first when relating with others after which one can be called a good judge of character. This, however, is a very strong foundation to every relationship. It dictates the kinds of relationships that exist between and among us. It also highly determines the amount of time that those we are in a relationship with stay in our lives.

As time goes by some relationships become stronger while others become weak. Along the path of life and relating we pick and drop others. Whether we are the ones picked or dropped matters a lot. What those who leave have left behind is extremely important. There is always a lesson in every meeting in our lives and it is always good for one to contemplate on what you have gained or lost. These things that we are left with make us who we are especially the good character traits.

On the other hand an individual’s personality matters a whole lot. Just like the good book teaches that one ought not see the stick in their brothers’ eyes but rather remove the log that is in their own. ‘You attract your own,’ one of my teachers back in the days always reminded me that and indeed its true. Sometimes the kind of people crossing our paths may not be the problem but us. Maybe your character and mind setting is the undesirable one. Maybe that negative minded person is attracted to you by your very own negative actions and words.

Before you claim that they are insulting and arrogant check what you did to provoke that. Since you claim that they hold a barbaric opinion keenly listen to them not to be the barbaric one instead. It would not hurt to look at things with an open mind and better still always have room for correction.

We can never prevent different people from crossing our paths. Looking at it positively it is always good to meet people who are different especially in their thinking. Always take it as a challenge.

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