Modern day parenting: It is wrong to undress in front of your children

On Sunday, I had a conversation with one of my good friends known as Ken Singh after he attended a meeting on child protection.

Many people out there are either ignorant on the rights of the child or don’t offer the right protection to their kids. Gone are the days we thought that every adult is innocent and responsible. With the internet age, many evil things take place or might take place. We have some old practices, which work, and others that are obsolete. For example, in the olden days, any adult had the responsibility of protecting a child whenever they noticed something wrong.

It was common for another adult to come to one’s parents and report his misconduct. The teacher also had the added responsibility of protecting a child. With the modern era, most parents will call any adult trying to protect their child as a stranger and it is better for everyone to mind their own business.

Some of the key pointers Ken came up with from the meeting, which I will expound, are as follows:

1. Never buy any child a gift without the knowledge of their parents: Always explain to the child why you are gifting them. Times are changing, so is the society. An innocent gesture mightland you in trouble.

2. As a parent, if you spot something you did not buy, don’t assume: Always ask where it came from. This rule cuts across to teenagers living under your roof. For example, your secondary school child can’t be have a more expensive phone than yours, yet you did not buy it.

3. Never allow your child go for sleepovers:  simply because it’s the home of a friend from their class and you haven’t done enough background check on him and his parents. This is the point where they start doing drugs or other things banned at home. It is much safer to avoid sleepovers all together. 

4. Dot Com parents, it is a taboo to undress in front of your child: Even if you are of same gender. Also teach them the importance of privacy and tell them no one should touch them no matter who they are and they should not be afraid to report such improper act. 

5. Not every uncle or auntie has moral values: Some are demons from hell. Demarcate boundaries with your little girls and boys explaining to them why they can’t sit on the laps of “uncles” or “aunties” or kiss them.  

6. Sleeping with relatives: Try your level best as a parent to avoid your children sleeping with “relatives” who come to visit you. Most children are molested by their own relatives who look responsible. Usually, our kids are threatened by fear and confusion thus ending up keeping quiet.  Our society is getting rotten by the day due to the fact that technology has made it easier to adult content.

7. Gadgets: Always monitor what the children are doing with gadgets and always put in parental control. We are having cases of young children abusing other children because of what they watched in some crazy sights. Remember unlike our days, with technology there are free porn websites with easy to access just by the click on the phone.

8. Avoid posting pictures of your child on social media: Before posting a photo of any kid, always ask for permission from their parents as we have sick people out here. I see many court cases in future where children will be suing their parents and others for posting their pictures on the net.

9. If your child tells you something, don’t be quick to dismiss them: Give them a listening ear and investigate. Assure them you will look into the matter. This way, you give them trust and confidence.

10. Quality time: Unlike the olden days where a child could be raised by society, nowadays, it is important to dedicate your time in raising them. Most of the parents are busy with work and leave the responsibility of raising their children to teachers and house helps which is not a good thing.

Some parents will not agree with what the minutes of our meeting, but it is better to be careful than sorry. The stories I hear from adults out here about being abused when young are shocking. Some end up hating their parents because they think they encouraged it by not listening to them.

— [email protected]; @AineaOjiambo