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Possible celebrities controversies in 2013

PULSE
By - | January 4th 2013

 As celebville ushers in the New Year in earnest with zealous projections and new opportunities knocking, Geoffrey Korio looks into his crystal ball and, in jest, foresees the following ‘possible’ scenarios likely to headline showbiz rags

Size 8 and Avril cat fights

Their cold war and drama started a couple of years back. Well, being the two new hot singers then, with each releasing hit song after another, the two found themselves edging each other out as favourites in major shows and awards nominations. They snubbed and ignored each other as the industry proved to be too small to accommodate the two divas. Avril has been winning the awards. Size 8 has been winning the big shows.

Now that they are recording at one label, Ogopa DJs, Pulse predicts a knockout session (and we don’t mean the studio booth sessions). The two will start catfights over anything — from shows to studio time, boyfriends, to who gets the hotter Ogopa beat. They will eventually start pulling each other’s weaves and hurling insults at each other in public.

Camp Mulla release a goodbye hit and split to venture into solo careers

Well at the end of the day, it is all about making money. And let’s be honest, you can’t forever shine as a group; you have to create your own identity. Camp Mulla’s huge egos combined with their parents ‘mulla’ will prove too much for this multi-talented urban hip-hop group, as each will go out of their way to create an identity, individually, in the international music market.

One or two will go out of their way to make one of those memorable hits, while others will fly out for ‘further studies’. But not before doing what they do best, making a hit.

Joey Muthengi and Amina to quit radio for music

They are fresh, multi-talented and divas in their own right. Boasting of plethora of talents ranging from singing, emceeing and acting, these two vibrant stars will call it quits in the radio world and head for greener pastures.

 Joey will head for a Channel O job in South Africa (with a little birdie already telling Pulse that she is already bored with radio). As for Mishy Amina, her music will sound too good to her own ears, and convince her to call it quits and focus on a debut album — full time.

Shaffie Weru marries, divorces, remarries then goes back to Debbie

Pulse predicts a tumultuous time for the controversial radio presenter in terms of relationships. What will start as a glamorous and blooming relationship with a special someone culminating into an expensive private wedding.

 This, however, will soon be overshadowed by a full blown marital woes resulting in an equally expensive divorce. But that will only be the half of it, after the divorce, Shaffie will get back with none other than his baby-momma Debbie.

Fareed Kimani joins Ghetto radio

It will involve a string of events starting with Shaffie Weru’s suspension as a result of drunken rage drama, thanks to the marital woes alluded to above. Mbusi will likely be pulled in by the big cash and kick out Shaffie from Kiss 100s Rush Hour show taking his place as a co-presenter. The chaps at the Ngara-based radio station will want a little change of personalities as they go into the year of the jubilee. Thus, they will bring the uptown in a de Ghetto by making Fareed Kimani head presenter. But the Rude Awakening presenter will be forced to relive his uptown personality and adapt a Kikuyu accent in the name of sheng’.

Juliani and Brenda Wairimu break up

Described as the showbiz couple of 2012, ghetto bred artiste Juliani and uptown model Brenda will end their gangsta-good girl relationship due to personal reasons. Details of who dumped who first will never see the light of day but Brenda will be linked to some fly and equally light complexioned tycoon.

Daddy Owen and Sarah Hassan (Tanya) finally a couple

And still on couples, the covert affair between multi-award winner gospel artiste Daddy Owen and Mashariki Mix host Sarah Hassan (formerly Tanya in Tahidi High) will finally come to the light. This will be a result of bowing to both personal and media pressure.  While they might describe themselves as good friends, the relationship will arguably flourish to the point of being showbiz couple for 2013. 

Nameless and Wahu to get another baby

Top showbiz couple Nameless and Wahu have undoubtedly had prosperous years and trust them to reward themselves this year with plenty of things including having another baby. Besides being successful, this showbiz family has seen how their beloved daughter is lonely and has no sibling to play with, and hence, this prediction. Wahu will make another hit with baby Tomiso being replaced as the celebrity toddler with a hit dedicated to the newborn. Only this time, she will use dance beats, not riddims.

Early Evictions for Kenyans in BBA

After Prezzo did Kenya proud in last year’s Big Brother Stargame reality TV show, this year’s edition already looks and smells like a tough one especially for us Kenyans. Representatives from other countries will make it very tough to the extent of a Kenyan pulling a Kaz and Alex betrayal stunt and nominating another Kenyan for a possible early eviction.

Gospel artistes turn to secular Music

As much as Pulsers are wishing for a drama-free year for the gospel artistes, Pulse sees some of the major gospel artistes turning to secular music (or something close to it). With most of them boasting of successful trademarks in the gospel scene, they will definitely do something controversial and Pulse predicts a venture into the secular world — something they will defend as a sin-free stunt.

Jaguar and Prezzo collabo

The beef between these two showbiz icons is still considered as one of the most epic ones in the local scene. However, the two are good business dealers and with the beef now over, they may just see an opportunity to shock the whole world with a collabo. All of this will be in efforts of staying relevant in the showbiz world.

Bamboo settles in Dubai

He was once quoted saying that there is no competition here (in Kenya) and his target is the international audience. The 25flow hit maker will find a difficult time in the local scene and seek greener pastures. And there’s no better place to start with than Dubai. We just hope that he won’t do business with those con promoters and come back home in tears.

Rabbit, DNA, BMF, P-Unit, Habida, STL and Anto-Neosoul for this year’s Safaricom Concert

After successful town-to-town tours and parties, the next big headache for Safaricom will be selecting a fresh batch of artistes to market the brand during the countrywide concerts. However, even before the year ended, speculations were high that the above named will be the next instalment of the popular concerts.

The selection is quite simple; Rabbit, DNA, Habida and STL have been constantly making hits and boast of vast performance experiences. Anto-Neo soul is the fresh emcee, while BMF is the only popular and ‘clean’ gospel group.

As for P-Unit, the debate lies in whether they can balance their work with the pressure from the travelling, campus storms, and daily rehearsals.

Smitta to go bald

This one needs no explanation; just wait and see.  However, the impetus will be a result of losing a bet against his beloved Chelsea club.

PS The views expressed in this column are skewed to provoke fun and comic relief and should not be taken that seriously. This is not (necessarily)

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