Single, happy but still waiting!

Incidences of mature unmarried women are increasing with more professional women in their late 30s and 40s enjoying life as independent ‘living singles’. RHOYDA NYAMBANE spoke to some of them

Incidences of mature unmarried women are increasing. Professional women in their late 30s and 40s are happy, independent ‘living singles’.

REV MIRIAM GICHUNG’WA: Marriage counsellor; lecturer at JKUAT and Multi-Media University

Having handled women in their 30s, 40s and 50s, Rev Gichung’wa says each category has its unique challenges.

"Women in their 30s feel they still have a lot of time to make decisions so they tend to be choosy and set high standards that many men cannot meet.

"Before they realise it, the women have turned 40 and desperation sets in, so they rush into relationships, which they end up regretting,’’ says Rev Gichung’wa.

"Majority of those in their 40s have established careers and acquired property, so many men shy off from such women because they feel threatened.

Besides, most men in that age bracket are taken so the older, single women suffer limited choices. As a result, they invest in material things because they suffer from insecurities," Rev Gichung’wa adds.

Women approaching their 50s struggle with loneliness. They tend to hate men and cry over lost relationships, cursing those men who messed them up when they could have made better choices.

"Most of these women suffer from rejection, bitterness and stigma,’’ says Gichung’wa.

She implores society not to stigmatise these women because they need love, understanding and support.

* some names have been changed.