Why Ole Jomo must not give rich Kenyans jobs

By  MAFTAH YUSUF

CORD is disgruntled with Ole Jomo for appointing a tribunal of ‘wolves’ to investigate the conduct of ‘lambs.’ I beg to differ that lambs are being subjected to obvious persecution because the JSC cannot claim to be ‘weupe kama pamba’. (as white as cotton).

 CORD believes the list of members in the said tribunal lacks integrity as all of them are implicated in one way or another in attempting to uphold the Jubilee agenda.

They have also voiced fears over the appointment of the tribunal chairman Aaron Ringera, a self-confessed slayer of the ‘sacred cows’ when he was head of the KACC. However, the cows are still grazing in peace. Ringera might have an axe to grind with the JSC for labelling him ‘damaged goods’ unfit for the post of appellate Judge.

We can only imagine Ringera and his tribunal members approaching their job with too much enthusiasm. Tables will turn and some former JSC members like Ahmed Nassir Abdullahi will be made to catch hell the way they made some applicants for judicial positions to catch hell.

And allegations are flying all over about the allegiance of the other members of the tribunal, some of which are true. So to break the impasse so that the country can move forward, I offer myself as one of the members of that tribunal alongside fellow Kenyans who can prove impartiality.

First and foremost, I have never eaten a delicacy commonly referred to in public departments as sitting allowance. I hear that this sitting allowance is so scrumptious; it has the capacity to weka a common mwananchi like Timbuktu ‘mpangoni’ for many years. 

I mean, who would not want a seven-figure sitting allowance wired to his bank atop his monthly pay. Obviously, the judiciary has demonstrated both fairness and prejudice instead of keeping their affairs strictly along the straight and narrow corridors of justice.

 And then we were treated to a theatre of the absurd when emails of Chief Justice Willie’s war council got to see the light of the day, and Kenyans got to learn with horror that their reformed Judiciary is a hotbed of  ‘mapambano’ and intrigues. Therefore, men in this country should stand up and be counted instead of pretending to be innocent bystanders in this issue. How can one see no evil when the musical chairs playing at the Judiciary are eroding our justice system?  What would happen if a mad man petitioned against the legitimacy of the government say, for the flimsy reason that the CEO and his deputy are indictees.

We cannot import justices from China. What Ole Jomo requires to do is give chance to serve in these high power agencies to ordinary wananchi who will spread the gospel far and wide.

Take me for instance. I am educated, jobless, your common hustler whose hopes for a better life are dashed by lack of opportunity.

We have heard of cases where mandazi in a certain workshop was billed at Sh8,000 per piece.

Imagine how grateful a fellow who is used to consuming five-shillings mandazi will be if you offer him a chance to taste the divine version served in workshops conducted by agencies funded by the taxpayer!

And the perks that come with the job will clear all his debts in one fell swoop and mortgage if there is a bank crazy enough to extend the service to those at the bottom of the pecking order. We are talking about the millions of Kenyans who yell blue murder whenever they receive their pay cheque at the end of the month.

This is because, the amount, after statutory deductions, is hardly enough to service recurrent expenditure leave alone have something left over for development. No wonder Recce commandos felt they could pinch some ‘water’ from Nakumatt during the Westgate shopping mall siege. So when the political class is quarrelling about how to share appointments, as the most fitting reward for their cronies, we kindly request Ole Jomo to surprise us by giving a few lucky Kenyans an early Christmas. Let there be a national raffle where the winners will be appointed to the said tribunal.

As long as the exercise is conducted with transparently and accountability, there will be no mbrrr cha (problems). But when fellows like Timbuktu who see a man of the people like Ole Jomo giving money to the already moneyed like Ringera and Co, a feeling of exploitation begins to take shape. And then we can say that ours is a country where eating opportunities are truly rotational. Of course because I am the genius who came up with the master plan, I should automatically be appointed.

And when I finally become an officer of state, and the money starts rolling in, we can get down to the nitty gritty involving the conduct of the JSC. We shall, of course be vacationed somewhere at the Coast as we feast upon the fruits of Independence.