Tax the dead and send bill to the living

By Mugambi Nandi

The famous quote about the certainty of death and taxes has long been attributed to Benjamin Franklin, even though the first record of its appearance was in Daniel Defoe’s book, The Political History of the Devil, in 1726. Things have not changed at all since then. If death does not strike you, taxes will. Even if death strikes you, Caesar will not relent in the pursuit of his dues from you.

We understand that the people of Kiambu County are now living in mortal fear of a proposed death tax. Their beloved Governor has proposed to impose “death” taxes but members of his County Assembly will hear none of it. To be fair to Governor Kabogo, he is not alone in taxing the dead.

Her Majesty the Queen of the United Kingdom and those before her have long imposed (and collected) Inheritance Tax on the estates of their departed subjects. What is more, the tax is due within six months of the end of the month in which the deceased died, failing which interest is charged on the outstanding amount.

The United States of America too has a death tax, called the Estate Tax. The tax men in Belgium, Finland, France, Germany, Italy, Japan, The Netherlands, Norway and Switzerland too might have mercy for the dead and their bereft, but it is not enough to save them from the death tax.

Looking at this starry list, you can see clearly that Governor Kabogo is seeking to emulate the best. Aware that this sort of thing needs to be approached with caution, he has proposed insignificant death levies of about Sh4,000. This amount is nothing compared to the average tax rate of 40 per cent applied to the estates of the deceased in the developed countries.

It can be argued that beneficiaries of the estates of deceased persons should not suddenly come upon huge inheritances without paying tax. Looked at this way, the so-called death taxes are really not death taxes but taxes on the lucky (or is it unlucky?) beneficiaries.

You can rest assured that any levies and charges imposed on the dead by Governor Kabogo will simply be added to the “funeral expenses” for which a “major” fundraising meeting will be convened. We have the despicable culture of fundraising for funeral expenses even for wealthy people whose families do not need the money.

If I may digress within the same broad topic, I have it on the authority of Mzee Adiel Nandi (my grandfather, who is well 100 years old and still around to confirm this), that among the Chuka people, the dead and the dying were abandoned in the bushes to be devoured by hyenas. Christianity came along and introduced coffins and hearses and black clothes and wreathes, among other funeral accessories, for which we now fundraise with aplomb.

Man is ingenious. He has invented ways to avoid taxes, or to minimise them, and is working tirelessly on how to evade death altogether.

I thought I might share some of them with you.

The first one is to stay poor. No one, not even the tax man, will remember that you exist. The second one is to avoid death. Good luck with that one.

The third one is to move counties, if you live in Kiambu. In the developed countries, marrying your partner will save you some tax.

Finally, in the same countries, give to charity even if you are not religious. Leaving at least 10 per cent (same size as a tithe, or a bribe) of your wealth to charity will reduce your tax rate. Look around at the philanthropists. They are good tax planners.

By the way, it is unfair that Benjamin Franklin should get the credit for the quote, just because Daniel Defoe was not half as famous, but that is how the world works.