If only Baraza was the bigger person we wouldn’t know Kerubo

Wanyonyi Wambilyanga

I was reading an article and this passage struck me: "Everyone gets angry and wants to fire back at someone. Everyone gets hurt, or has someone that talks about them. Everyone will lose someone they thought was a friend. We let it go and be the bigger person.

"By reacting to someone that is trying to hurt you or talk about you, all we do is become that person. And believe me that is the last thing you want. Think about how that person has no confidence in himself or herself.

"Think about how that person wishes to see you suffer. Think about persons who are trying to make themselves look better by talking about you. These people are bullies." These were words of a one Sensei Nick. And it hit me that rarely do we exhibit leadership in our interactions. For myriad reasons people will always be out to annoy or belittle us, but the difference is how we respond.

A good example is that of a driver on a Nairobi street. He will want to overlap and get to their destination with little disregard for other road users. They often block you on the road and will do it again and again. But there are drivers who will not let them pass and in the mess they either get hit or create a snarl-up — eventually both drivers and hundreds of other motorists and passengers fail to get to their destinations in time.

Obscenities will be hurled, on some occasion punches will be thrown and I’m sure you have heard a bullet or two fired during such lamentable interactions. Ideally you can waste two or three seconds but save valuable minutes if you become the bigger person and let them pass. Nothing has been lost.

This mentality we perpetuate in our homes with the attitude of ataniona leo. Needless to say violence and break-ups have been witnessed from such interactions when the source of altercation is a very petty reason.

Deputy Chief Justice was hailed as a woman of mettle, an intellectual and a reformist. She has been the voice of the oppressed, one who would never let the weak be flattened by the mighty. In simple terms, she was a woman of the people. As a result of the credentials she has painstakingly built, she was appointed to head the Judiciary as Chief Justice Willy Mutunga’s deputy. Unfortunately, she is now the laughingstock of the country. In the matatus, radio hosts are busy making fun of her. In newspapers cartoonists are having a field day. Not to mention cartoons doing rounds on social media. And for what? She had a spat with a security guard over routine search on customers accessing the Village Market.

Was it in order for the guard to ask that she be frisked? By all means, yes. Did it matter that she is VIP? No, it did not. If everyone is being frisked then a VIP too needs to be frisked.

What transpired after the request failed I have no clue, but it would have saved Baraza so many blushes, effort, time and respect... had she chosen to be the bigger person. I think the guard may have told her off and Baraza got all worked up, if that was the case, but my bet is the guard wasn’t trying to size up the madam.

Whatever the case she was just doing her job. Baraza has all the exposure to know that anyone in her situation needed only to tell guard: "Habari, mkubwa! Kazi iko sawa?" And proceed to her vehicle. She did not and as a result the guard has emerged as the hero of the tale, while Baraza is the villain. For a person who has been on the trenches fighting for the rights of the minority, Baraza would have and should have stood as the bigger person.

Writer is a Chief Sub-Editor The Standard Weekend Editions.