Do your own Budget instead of waiting for Uhuru

By Kipkirui K’Telwa

Forget about this year’s Budget. Instead, budget for hard times. Expect Finance Minister Uhuru Kenyatta to read a Budget full of "typos" and "errors" that he shall not be held politically responsible. Purchase more consumable commodities this month. I hope you know that just a few days to that budget afternoon basic commodities will either disappear from shelves or their prices will go up. So get your figures rihght instead of waiting for the day when MPs crowd in to the chamber to sleep the entire period Uhuru will be reciting figures he least understands.

Of course MPs will call it "mwananchi Budget" though they slept throughout the entire session.

As someone put, do not expect Uhuru to propose taxing MPs, or reducing the number of ministries to ease taxpayers’ burden in the Budget. No, that path brought down one Amos Kimunya.

Collusion Budget

Alas if you are poor. Uhuru will not consider your suffering. He serves a government of the rich. He has to get his maths right before a cheeky Mwalimu puts some unfriendly marks on it. Hey, the math has to balance with the huge Government expenditure. So should yours. Otherwise, if you get them wrong, your family, unlike the bloated coalition government, risks collapsing. And you will not like that.

This is a collusion Budget and both ODM and PNU have a duty to unite in robbing every Kenyan of their coins.

Therefore you should expect basic commodities and services such as food, maize, milk, medicine, bread, water, petrol and even salt to become unavailable in Kenya. That is if their prices do not go up. And we laugh at Zimbabweans when they buy bananas @Sh6million per piece. Pole kwa sababu tutaanguka bure as we chase a none-existent mwananchi Budget. Does your Budget balance?