Day of girl child: My struggle raising three children due to early pregnancy

Cynthia Barasa during interview at her rural home at Khanyiririsi village in Lugari. She got pregnant at a tender age of 13. [Benjamin Sakwa, Standard] Cynthia Barasa, 25, lost her mother in 2007, just after she had turned 12. She was a Standard Six pupil at Masindu Friends Yearly Meeting (FYM) primary school in Bungoma County. Her three sisters younger sisters were in lower primary but in different schools. Ms Barasa would trek for over three hours to and from their home at Khanyiririsi village in Lugari constituency, Kakamega County to Masindu primary. After a short while, her father, Daniel Ovendo who died in 2017 got himself another wife. "The moment my father remarried, my life changed completely," she told The Standard. She claimed that the stepmother started mistreating them to the point of denying them food "but our father turned a blind eye on our plight even when we reported to him what was happening." "Most of the time I could go to school hungry and spent the whole day without eating anything since I had no money," recalled Barasa. She adds: "When my fellow pupils went for lunch, I remained behind because going home would take me three hours, besides, it would have been meaningless going back because I would not be given food anyway." Circumstances pushed her into an early relationship and she got herself a boyfriend while in class seven. The boyfriend was a class eight pupil in a neighbouring school in their village. Ms Barasa said the boyfriend gave her a shoulder to lean on and offered her Sh100 every weekend. "The money could last me a whole week, I spent it on breakfast and lunch while in school." "My boyfriend was everything to me, he comforted me and that is why I easily gave in to his sexual advances ending up pregnant at the age of 13 years," she said. She adds: "I was chased away by my father for bringing shame to the family, being the firstborn daughter. My siblings also denounced me and I sought asylum at one of our relatives place just to protect my pregnancy which my family wanted terminated." Barasa found it hard living with the relative and opted to go back home where she sneaked into a neighbour's unused kitchen and converted it into her new home. The owner was based in Nairobi and says Ms Barasa did not seek his permission before occupying the kitchen. "He was informed by villagers that I had moved into his kitchen but they explained my situation to him and he sympathised with me and gave me the go-ahead to stay. Ms Barasa resorted to harvesting and cooking sweet potatoes planted behind the kitchen by his absentee host. She would then be blessed with a baby boy but none of his immediate family members paid her a visit despite the homestead being separated by a fence. According to Barasa, when the baby boy started crawling, she decided to look for a job in order to get money to take care of her son. Her boyfriend had gone missing. She went to work as a house help at Moi Barracks in Eldoret where she used to earn Sh1,000 per month around mid-2009. "My boss was a Somali businessman whose house hosted at least 15 people on top of his family," said Barasa saying she used to wake up as early as 4 am and go to bed at around 10.30 pm exhausted every day. She avers that despite her struggles, all she wanted was food and shelter. She worked there for six months. Barasa could save Sh500 every month and send the balance to his father. "One day my stepmother called to inform me that my father had been taken ill and that he was in a critical condition. I sent her all my savings." That morning she terminated her employment and went back home to nurse her 'ailing' father but to her surprise, she found him and the stepmother on the farm working. Barasa claims that when the money she had sent to them five days earlier was over, they disowned her again. She would later secure another house help job in Kakamega town where she used to earn Sh1,500/- per month. "My employer was hostile to the extent of threatening to attack me with a hot cooking stick and she didn't want to see my son in her house. After three months, I called it quits and went back home," recalled Barasa. She would later secure another house help job in Kisumu but the employer was categorical that her child was not welcome as she was supposed to take care of an elderly person. Somehow, Barasa managed to convince her father to stay with the grandson but on condition that she would send money every month for her child's upkeep out of her Sh2,000 meagre pay. Twelve months later, she quit the job and decided to get married to a man she met in Kakamega town. She gave birth to a baby girl in 2011 at the age of 15 years. Two years later, Ms Barasa gave birth again to a baby boy. She relocated to Siaya together with her spouse until 2017 when she got out of her matrimonial home upon the death of her father. She claimed that her stepmother stepmother had sold half of their land and divorced her father before he died. "My husband squandered the money that was raised by friends and neighbours for my father's funeral arrangements and he never showed up during the burial of his father-in-law, which raised a red flag," said Barasa. She went on: "After burial, I went back to my husband. I found him smoking bhang. He told me that he could kill me and that he only spared me because of the respect he had for my late father. Barasa did not wait for the worst to happen, she sneaked out and returned to her ancestral home. With three children and her three siblings to fend for, she had a lot to do. Besides, her parent's house was about to collapse and it took the intervention of a local priest to put up a new house for them. It was around the same time she decided to go back to school to finish her studies and she got enrolled in class eight at Mayoyo Mill Hill Missionaries primary school where she scored 287 marks in KCPE examinations in 2018. "I was in class eight with my younger sisters and my children in the same school. The teachers ensured we had something to eat, whenever there was no food, I would skip classes." Barasa would later join Mahanga K Secondary School but dropped out barely one month later due to financial difficulties. "Well-wishers came to my rescue and they ensured I had books, uniform and even food. Among those who paid her school fees are Kakamega woman representative Elsie Muhanda and pastor Ainea Wafula. Barasa got C - (minus) of 38 points in the KCSE examinations in 2022. All along, she had embraced the Depo-Provera family planning method to avoid getting pregnant again to date. Depo-Provera is given as an injection every three months and it typically suppresses ovulation, keeping a woman's ovaries from releasing an egg. Prime Cabinet Secretary Musalia Mudavadi who graced the inaugural Mulembe Women Caucus conference at Masinde Muliro University of Science and Technology (Mmust) early this year was touched with Barasa's story and pledged to pay her college fees. Barasa says she would wish to join the police service so that she can educate her children and siblings who have since dropped out of school due to financial difficulties.

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