Pain of man robbed of his fatherhood

Robert Muigana, 34. [Phillip Orwa, Standard]
Moving out of his matrimonial home may have been the worst decision Robert Muigana ever made. But he says he had no choice.

The relationship between him and his wife had broken irredeemably.

He says his son, whom he has never seen since October 2018, was the only reason he held onto the marriage for that long.

Muigana last saw his son in  October 2018 when visited  his estranged wife in Athi River. He says he had a good time with his boy and even went shopping.

But four days later when he visited the flat, he was informed they had moved out.

“It hurts that someone is keeping me from seeing him (my son),” he complains.

There was no phone call or even a sign that they were planning to relocate. It hit him hard – so hard that he contemplated suicide.

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“It hurts, it really does. I love my boy so much. What is worse is that people out here speak of dead beat dads, but no one considers there are men who really want to be fathers but they have been denied a chance to be,” says the 34-year-old.

Muigana says he never thought his son would grow away from him. He never expected his marriage to fall apart either.

The man says his relationship with his wife was initially rosy. “We were college sweethearts and we even had church wedding on June 15, 2013. Our son was honeymoon baby. We were happy, or so I thought,” he recalls.

However, things fell apart fast in the first two years of their marriage.

Muigana, who is a taxi driver, claims one of the reasons their relationship fell apart was because he he never landed a stable job while his wife was well off.

It is similar turmoil that led Dennis Mwangi to form Fathers Rights Movement-Kenya, an organisation with social media presence, that advocates for the rights of men denied a chance to be fathers.

Mwangi says he would not wish any man to go through what he did.

“I once tried hanging myself only that the ceiling was not strong to support me. I cried like a baby until my mother came and took me back home,” he said.

Mwangi says while in his case he was able to reconcile with his former wife, many men have not been lucky.

“Any woman who is practicing parent alienation should not be called a single mother because the father of the child is present and is willing to be participate. Bringing up a child is not just about sending money. Fatherhood is more than just paying child support,” he says.

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Robert MuiganaFathers Rights Movement-KenyaDennis MwangiFathers day