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Why Kenyan married women keep many secret lovers

County_Nairobi
                                Photo:Courtesy

Women on average sleep with two men in their lifetime, while a man will bed seven, the latest Kenyan Demographic and Health Survey has claimed.

Many Kenyans are however questioning the validity of the results with many claiming the results are understated.

“Where was the survey conducted? The results do not represent the reality on the ground, or at least not in Nairobi,” says Alex Kipkorir, a Nairobi-based animator.

Judge Ian Mbugua concurs with Kipkorir and says:

“That depends on where the survey was conducted, but quite obviously, men have more multiple sexual partners than women, even though women are catching up.”

On why women are catching up, Mbugua attributes this to excitement, revenge and the adventurous nature of the modern woman.

Pastor Peter Chemsweet from Solai Nakuru has however termed the research findings too conservative.

“The current generation is highly promiscuous. It is very hard to get morally upright people today,” he said.

Chemaswet who doubles up as a historian says the fact that condoms have almost become a basic need is evidence that things are bad.

“The government has distributed condoms to every corner of the country, even the ministries have condom dispensers. I read in The Nairobian the other day that the ‘gadgets’ are stocked at the Nairobi County Assembly. What are they for?” he posed.

“In fact, there was a time the drainage at Continental House and even Intercontinental Hotel were blocked by used condoms. This just shows the level of promiscuity in society,” added the pastor.

“To say that a married woman will sleep with two men in her lifetime and a married man seven women in a lifetime is gross understatement,” The figures should be double or triple for those residing in urban areas like Nairobi,” said Chemaswet.

Ziwani/Kariokor MCA, Millicent Wambui Mugadi says it is hard to ascertain the exact number of sexual partners an individual will have in a lifetime.

“Sexual matters are very personal and depend on where and how someone has been raised,” she says, explaining that the numbers do not reflect the reality in the world she lives.

“Men can chest-thump about it, but for women, it’s a shame,” says the MCA.

Dr Grace Wamue-Ngare, a senior lecturer of Gender and Development Studies at Kenyatta University says that: “Most women tend to sleep with fewer men. The same applies to men. There are many variables that may not have been captured by the survey.

It is common for men to overstate the number of women they have slept with, and women do the reverse.

“That is true. It is because men who have slept with more women are deemed to be ‘heroes’ both in the eyes of men and women. Their escapades are celebrated,” she says. “But for women, there is a stigma that comes with gender stereotyping,” she adds.

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