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How to approach your crush for the first time without being crushed
By Brian Onyiego | Updated Aug 10, 2017 at 15:55 EAT
Man approaching a woman
  • Dating can become tiresome especially when you do not know how to approach your crush.
  • Talking to your crush can be a nerve-racking experience and that is why you need to approach him/her like a pro.

Dating may get you unaware if you do not know how to respond to the opposite sex. What to wear? What to say? Where to touch? When to call? When to go for the second date? Creates confusion and makes dating tiresome.

Up your game with following easy steps.

Think of it this way; a lion in a park starving to death and all of a sudden a gazelle appears in the bush. What does the lion do? First it spies on the prey for the first few minutes and immediately dashes for it, the gazelle ducks but it is outsmarted by the lion's speed and strength.

The same applies when you see someone attractive, do not wait until someone else approaches first. Go and start a conversation. A handshake would be good for the first time.

If he/she does not accept the handshake. Kindly ask where the washrooms are and walk out fast. If she/he turns to your direction and accepts your handshake, proceed to the next point.

With a smile on your face, compliment your crush and be honest about it. Mention how you had butterflies when he/she entered the room.

Be generous with your compliments, three compliments are enough.

  • Confidence

What you say does not matter, the way you say it is what matters. Confidence makes things look excellent even when it is a big mistake.

Fidget a little, speak with a calm voice.

  • Humour

Laughter always breaks the ice, do this in moderation or else you stand to be friend-zoned.

  • Maintain eye contact

Laughter with a maintained eye contact ignites a sparkle in your crush.

  • Show interest

You will win points if you constantly ask interesting questions, this fuels the conversation.Questions like: What is your day job? Which college did you go to?When is your birthday? Are overused and sound dull.

Instead ask questions like: How did he/she know about a certain place? Was he/she recommended by a friend or was out of curiosity?

To make sure it is a good start share the same opinions.

  • Ask for a date

I stopped asking for dates via phone calls and messages, I ask for dates in face to face conversations. If I am turned down it is an automatic turn off.

Suggest places that both of you have heard before and are okay to visit for a first date, it will also reduce the chances of being turned down or no shows.


  • Be brief

Take 10-15 minutes with your crush, you want your crush to remain interested and think about you the moment he/she leaves.

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