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Cool party at Co-operative University leaves me high like a kite

UREPORT
By Collins Osanya | March 10th 2017

Last week, I arranged a meeting of urgency with my benefactor. This comrade needed cash! So I met him at his work station and after he’d circumcised the day’s chores, we made our away to Galleria Mall, a respectable ground where our Collective Bargaining Agreement terms could be reviewed

Oh! I forgot. I dislike malls. Darn places are always filled with crawling rich folks and limping broke jamaas like me. Psst! You know she’s broke when she takes countless selfies holding a java coffee cup or next to a large pizza she’s sharing with five other (selfie taking, wannabe cool class) comrades.

At Galleria. I made sure we sat at an isolated table so no idle aged white woman could overhear confused me loudly wondering why dad was being too stingy.

And then it happened. She walked out past the supermarket doors and our eyes rammed into each other. Two years, eight months and one week later yet my last encounter with her still shakes the pillars of my stomach. We were in first year. Second semester.

Anyway, so one rainy Saturday evening, my roommates break the good news that there’s a party at Co-operative University; chicks and booze sorted. All required were five of us plus fair to that varsity and back to Multimedia Uni.

We arrived at 10pm and were received in style. Fruits soaked in bowl of whisky were seductively delivered at our lips by petite eye batting lasses. Then we was served whisky in whisky glasses. Ey! This was a hospitality I only saw in movies. Later on cakes and cookies were passed around, the six ladies carefully feeding us. I was in Zanzibar I tell you. But not for long.

I wasn’t drunk. I’d had only two fingers of the drink yet my world was spinning. All of a burden! I was cruising in excitement.

Felt like Trevor Noah, MCA Tricky and David the student were in that room. Oh! Boy! I had been drugged. My speech abandoned me. My feet went on strike and before I blacked out, she was the girl I saw last, daring the fool comrade from Mumias.

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