Can men be generous beyond beer tables?

Men are most generous while taking beer in a group. That generosity has perplexed me for a long time. The other day, someone left my head spinning. Can you buy me a drink, he requested. No, was my answer. But I can buy you lunch instead. The next response was just hilarious: “nitakula nyumbani”!

The economist in me was awakened. Why beer preference?  It is about scarcity. You will be more appreciated if you buy your friends something scarce, like alcohol, which is not available at home!

What struck me the most is that the drink the “friend” wanted was valued at Sh250, but I was willing to buy a lunch of Sh500. Why was Sh500 valued less than Sh250?  Does that make economic sense?

Let us dig deeper. The Sh250 is more than money if converted into alcohol. It’s about class, status; it’s manly.  Remember also, traditionally, you don’t buy someone one bottle of beer or one glass of wine or one tot, whatever one takes.  So the Sh250 could end up being Sh500 or more. My friend knew that, but I doubt if he knew the depth of my generosity.

The beer or drink sponsor is not innocent either! He feels more "powerful”  buying you something valued and scarce like alcohol, not food. Not to be “belittled”, other men at the table reciprocate their generosity with more bottles of alcohol, “meza inachafuliwa.” Rarely with coffee or tea cups.

This generosity is likely to overflow if there is a beautiful woman in the group. Impressing women haunts men all their lives. And seems our marital status does not matter.   

Beyond generosity, this behaviour indicates that consumption of food and drinks is not just about biological needs; our socio-psychological needs matter too, from status, ego and even our childhood deprivation.

Alcohol manufacturers and markets know that and address it through branding and pricing as your economic status improves. Who takes chang’aa, beer, wine, vermouths, and spirits whose value depends on age? How come we don’t complain about buying beer at Sh600 in a five-star hotel, yet the same beer goes for Sh300 or less elsewhere?

Some suggest the show-off at the beer table should reduce; we can show off on social media. What is not posted on social media nowadays? Caught in the beer generosity? Share the experience?  Women, or better ladies, let’s also hear your side of the story.