Those closeted witches who peddle election victory should focus their energies on a crisis threatening our national fabric held together by the harambee spirit since we attained Uhuru.

The warps and wefts that define Kenya could soon be frayed by an influx of deportees from Minesotta if President-elect Donald Trump makes true his threat to expel many illegal Kenyans on US soil.

These are those brothers and sisters of ours who found their way into the land of milk and honey through what we refer to as panya routes. They landed in the US with their local accents and have been passing themselves of as African Americans.

A former classmate confided to me that he has been regaling Latinos with tales of the African wilderness while serving his clients Taco. “That is how I have been able to afford this vacation,” he said with a wink.

But now that the new headboy of America hataki ujinga, Mugaka and Co will soon find themselves among us once again. And they could not have come back at a better time. With elections round the corner, I am sure patriotic sentiments will ensure our brothers will be accorded a warm Kenyan welcome.

Expect all those aspiring for political office to line up the streets to welcome our prodigal brothers as they show solidarity with the deportees in the hope that their cousins will vote for them.

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Then there are those who will initiate a sensitisation session to integrate them into the Kenyan society and pass over the inflated bill to the taxpayer. Of course, we do not want the horrors and trauma of expulsion to affect our brothers and sisters. A firm you never heard of before will conduct the orientation before expanding their services to the prison industry to help rehabilitate criminals released on a presidential pardon on Mashujaa day.

But after money has been made by hustlers who profit every time misfortune visits our shores, the poachers among the deportees will still continue their trade, as will the racketeers and pimps with a mile long criminal record.

As politicians engage Kenyans on Twitter on whether to allocate these new comers former IDP camps or the Dadaab refugee camp after we send home the Somalis, we may already be grappling with escalating crime especially in our inner cities.

If we do not watch it, these Afro-Americans might take over distribution of narcotics as they revise outdated methods of committing felonies in Nairobi.

We will be well advised to remember that most of them are criminals and that is why they had to be excluded from the campaign to make America great again.

On a mathree to Rongai, a hijacker might just announce, “Stick them up homies or you are all history!” a gun in his hands.

Now, we are hustlers, sufferers, even hawkers but never homies. In Kenya, we have been victims of carjacking but holdups, stickups and heists in general are all foreign. Therefore if people end up getting shot, it will be because of poor communication.

And if that happens, if the system fails to absorb the illegals the US sends back to the country, a probe into all the money we paid to rehabilitate them will be the next big item on the news.