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Handling drunk callers

What do you tell that lonely and troubled drunk dialler, who annoyingly calls you at 3am on a frequent basis to discuss nothing? PATRICK KARIUKI asks.

“I have this disease late at night sometimes, involving alcohol and the telephone. I get drunk, and I drive my wife away with breath like mustard gas and roses. And then, speaking gravely and elegantly into the telephone, I ask the telephone operators to connect me with this friend or that one, from whom I have not heard in years”.

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