'My encounter with a mean campus girl'- best thing you'll read all day

I have always told freshers that campus is where you come to meet all sorts of people from all kinds of backgrounds.

Fellows who sleep with the lights on; chaps who snore like dogs from rich South African neighborhoods; people who wear green shirts and orange loafers; people who listen to Octopizzo and Justin Bieber; people who peel tomatoes into perfect slices....

I, especially, dwell on the girls a boy meets in campus. I mean, besides booze and books, what else is campus for, right?

There are the beautiful girls one runs into on campus; perfect girls with smooth skin and soft voices and tonnes of tattoos on their thighs and piercings on the lips and noses and tongues. The wannabe lesbians, slay queens and tomboys.

These are the kind of girls that make campus interesting. The kind everybody wants to be seen with. But I have since come to realize that there is another group of campus girls that deserve our attention; the not-so-easy-on the-eye type. Some mean men call them ugly.

And, by the way, far be it from me to try to berate anyone by telling them they’re not good looking because I’m no Ryan Gosling myself.

However, I had quite an interesting encounter with a certain girl in school the other day and I feel like it’s a story that deserves telling. So if you’re the kind of person who gets their feelings hurt by labels then it’s probably best that you take off here, sawa?

A friend and I were walking through the school compound on Sunday. It was a boring afternoon and we were full from a meal of ugali and managu but our bodies were weak so Jeff (my buddy, not his real name) says: “Let’s go for a walk,” and I say: “Sure.”

A couple of meters from our hostel, we come across a group of four girls; three beautiful, and one...uhm...not so much. Jeff is not the type of guy to let a bevy of beauties walk past him without trying his luck, so we stop them for a chat and one of the ladies, the duckling among swans, and jumps into our faces before we can even say ‘Hi’.

“What do you want? Can’t you boys see we’re headed somewhere? Why are boys so rude?” *Waves hands before our faces* “Step aside, if you two want to talk you can talk to the hand.”

She said as she dragged her three friends away. I wasn’t as much hurt by her shutting us down, but more by her saying: “Talk to the hand...” What is this, 1960?

But here’s the thing, every group of beautiful girls in campus has that one friend. One of the beautiful girls may go missing once in a while but not her.

She will always be there, sticking out like a sore thumb, being a pain to anyone interested in her friends. For no proper reason.

Could it be because they know nobody is interested in talking to them in the first place?