How dumb is the ‘Xaxa Generation’?

So you are a twenty-first century kid. A millennial. Born and raised in an era where technological revolution is the ‘in-thing’. In your resume, you describe yourself as computer-literate. You also say, to your own credit, that you are creative.  You can add new words to the dictionary. Your prowess of coining new and ‘trendy’ lexical units is in no doubt. Indeed you have a whole language to show for it: Sheng! How proud should you be!

Not so fast though. Have you ever realized how petty that language is? Well, I will not fill these pages ranting about the ephemeral code. I will concern myself with the ‘xaxa’ madness, which has been with us for some time now. This style of communication, largely incomprehensible to ‘old-fashioned’ folks like me, has well earned its users the title “the Xaxa Generation”.

The ‘xaxa’ generation is largely found in Kenya. You will know them by the kind of things they write, whether online or offline, and how they write it. Their style of writing is a revolt of sorts against the rules of language. Short-hand writing, especially disturbing to the ‘uncultured’ eyes, befuddles. “Xaxa xwyty, I’m xowwy I xlept laxt nyt.” You will be excused for mistaking this as a corrupted version of Mandarin.

Their love for the short-hand has led them to develop an affinity for short-cuts. This generation is hailed for the lowest level of motivation. Be it speech-wise, academically, or in terms of doing legitimate work to get the penny. Shorter routes to achieving life goals appeal to them the most. Little wonder a recent survey showed they would do anything to get rich. Well, at least they have goals.

Members of this generation find it classy to shorten everything they touch. They will shorten their names to some unrecognizable tag. Well, it is cool, especially as an artiste, to have a pseudonym, but how about the rest of the lot? As if mutilating their names is not enough, some of these folks will shorten the length of their dresses and tops, and call it fashion. They will also condense the semester’s notes on a tiny piece of paper, and then confidently waddle into the exam room with it, for ‘reference’. Comrades must confirm their answers, indeed! They will even shorten the amount of time they spend in the bedroom (all the pun intended). The only time you will hear the narrative change is when they are looking for a mate: tall, blah, blah, blah.

On social media, especially Facebook, they will trash long expositions as “newspaper” articles. Never mind that they are barely even conversant with the content. Isn’t this the height of hubris? Dismissing what you don’t know? Intellectual lassitude restricts their reading scope. And by the way, who said that newspaper articles are written to be thrown in the trash can?  Perhaps this speaks for the concerns that Kenyan youth have a poor reading culture.

Such is the folly of your generation. Such is the crop of youth of whom Kenya boasts. Leaders of tomorrow. Leaders of today, they will insist. Are you a Thomas? This is hearsay, you say?

Well, just to be sure, ask that kid by your side to pass you his or her phone. Momentarily. Assure him or her that you won’t care to know what’s in the phone’s gallery. Browse through those conversations, paying no particular attention to the content. Do you see those hieroglyphics?

How long does it take you to decode the meaning?  Instantly? Treat yourself to some ‘nyama choma’ and cold beer!

Most likely, you won’t get the treat. ‘Xaxa Generation’ will not let you win such a simple challenge. The best it can do is infect you with its ailment. The ‘xaxa xwyty’ malady.

And, like the criminals that they are (only a criminal can do anything, including the illegal, to get rich), they can never miss a host of excuses. They will argue that the very spirit of SMS is to shorten communication. Communicating in a coded language. Like a cultist.

But why discombobulate the recipient of your message? Was the service intended to launch a revolt against mainstream language? Was it designed to encourage linguistic irresponsibility?

While creativity is an excellent thing, it seems to have a totally different meaning to this generation of misplaced energy. To them, it means confusing the oldies. It means typing ‘k’ rather than ‘okay’. It means an excessive use of emojis and smiley’s. And the men (oh, sorry, the boys) are complicit too.

Writing a complete word is like drilling through the bone with plastic straw to extract the marrow. The easy way is to them what light is to a moth. Such impatience! Little wonder that cougars and ‘sponsors’ appeal to them the most. Easy money. Little or no effort. They must be experts in ‘comfort zone 101.’

This generation is the master of typos. You must have noticed this as you tried the challenge above. Well, I commit them too.  Isn’t human is to err? But is it a leeway to make obvious mistakes? Mistake is to make a mistake and find an excuse for it. 

You’d think it is a problem limited only to micro-bloggers, like you and me.  But it gets so sickening when you have to bump on these typos on mainstream media outlets, where you expect a smoother ride. Mainstream media is the epitome of excellence. Or so it should be, as it were. And their professionals must never make obvious mistakes. One wonders if the chains of editors truly go through the piece in question, when this happens.

Okay, my glass house is clearly in danger. I can already see the stones flying towards it. It is a tricky affair slinging ink at a group of stone-wielding youth. If it is true that a wise man knows when to stop, then I will rest my case here.