When Human Resource places condoms in office washrooms, they all vanish in an hour. But you think Nairobians are using them? Hell no!

A survey conducted by UNAIDs revealed that most new couples only use protection on the first two days after hooking up and then bang! They are going 'skin-on-skin' like rabbits. If you think they visited a VCT first, you are crazy. Nairobians simply hate condoms, never mind that annually, the government distributes 180,000 pieces of free rubber 'begged' from development partners.

Here is how it plays out. She whispers, "Babe, that thing feels like a paper bag. Are you okay?" And the man she met yesterday on Facebook lies, "I am a virgin and too big for these Chinese tu-things." Never mind that last time he got tested was 2008. And before you know it, chlamydia, bacteria or two, a nasty virus and unwanted babies are getting exchanged like no one's business.

So what exactly makes Nairobians lose their guard when it comes to sex?

This week, we sampled some of the lame excuses that couples tinged with pride and bravado that make new lovers live by the reckless dictum, condom come-condom go.