Why children of British soldiers are searching for their fathers

BBC documented about 100 cases of children fathered by soldiers serving in the British Army Training Unit during the last 50 years in Kenya. [File, Standard]

A week ago, the BBC released a documentary in which lawyers and geneticists used commercial ancestry databases to trace British soldiers who fathered children in Kenya during their tour of duty.

The two-year BBC World of Secrets podcast and BBC Africa Eye investigation titled, "Abandoned: Searching for Soldier Dad," documented about 100 cases of children fathered by soldiers serving in the British Army Training Unit (BATUK) during the last 50 years.

James Netto, who, together with Kenyan human rights lawyer, Kelvin Kubai, represented nearly two dozen applicants, said each was seeking the answer to one fundamental question: “who is my father?”

The oldest child the team met was said to be 70 while the youngest was three-years-old. Their story begins in Nanyuki, in the shadows on Mount Kenya where British soldiers not only blasted ammunition but left footprints within local communities in the name of children who grew up without paternal identities; or until the new documentary exposed a number of these fathers.

As usual, Kenyans went ballistic on social media, voicing the pros and cons of adults raised by single parents (usually mothers) searching for their biological fathers.

For some, this is an exercise in futility, while for others, it was a chance to trace the men and perhaps hold them to account while benefiting materially.

Beyond the online commentaries, however, does it matter if a grown-up raised by one parent goes on a quest to look for the missing parent?

Yes, it matters, according to social commentators. Children, they say, have a natural desire to know about health history, genetic traits, and inherited characteristics.

According to the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA), tracing your family lineage may provide information about hereditary diseases, the information helping you take precautionary measures early on in life.

For example, some chronic diseases such as breast and ovarian cancer, diabetes, and heart disease can be inherited from either parent.

“Experts recommend using family gatherings to collect information. Talk with aunts, uncles, grandparents and cousins about the conditions people have had. If available, look at death certificates or family health records of deceased family members,” says UCLA.

Of course, the absence of such history can leave such medical questions unanswered while meeting and learning about the father can help resolve feelings of abandonment, fill emotional gaps, and provide closure.

“You must have an identity. Whose DNA do you carry?” asks former Provincial Commissioner Joseph Kaguthi. “We should never take it for granted that we know our roots.”

To illustrate how serious Kaguthi takes his family roots, he recalls an instance where he took a framed photo of his parents to a family gathering in order to prove the family’s lineage.

“My father was born in 1884, the year Europeans started to divide Africa among themselves. He never wore modern clothes, but he was my father. I am still proud of that,” says Kaguthi, the last born of his father’s third and youngest wife.

Kaguthi cautions young people from pressuring their single mothers to help them identify their absentee fathers, saying the children may never understand the undercurrents of the broken relationship.

“The mothers will provide such information in their own time. You know men can be naughty and may have dealt treacherously with their partners who may still be harbouring bitter feelings,” he says.

According to Cheryl Mwangi, a trauma therapist, we should not trivialise the quest by children, regardless of their age, to search for their biological fathers, adding that she has seen men and women coming back to Kenya from foreign countries in search of their fathers.

Such quests, adds Mwangi, help the children understand their families’ dynamics, traditions and cultural nuances which aid in building their sense of self by knowing where they come from, giving them stronger foundations for confidence. It also connects children to a lineage stretching beyond their immediate families but local communities.

“For men, it is mostly about identity and a sense of belonging,” she says. “Some want to know their fathers’ identities and learn of stories their mothers may never have wanted them to know.”

Others, she says, need reassurance and validation from the men who brought them into this world before vanishing. “Even as you grow older, you still have that inner child’s needs. You may feel that you were not good enough and were the reason that person left especially if you never saw him. Getting to know and interacting with him dispels such notions.”

Girls, Cheryl says, have a stronger affinity with their fathers and growing without knowing who he was can paralyse their key milestones including marriage where the role of a father is crucial. In addition, fathers serve as role models to girls, being viewed as sources of protection and shaping how daughters view themselves and future relationships. This bond is deeply emotional and rooted in trust, admiration, and the exceptional dynamics fathers bring to parenting.

“Nothing would count more for a girl who wants to get married than having her father walking her down the aisle. ‘‘It is the greatest act of reverence and honour for the daughter, one that sticks with her for the rest of her life,” she says.

One’s lineage, then, is more than bloodlines but a foundation for confidence, sense of belonging, and cultural identity. And while some may dismiss a child’s quest to search for a father as futile, any positive results connect individuals to family traditions, clarify medical histories, and restore dignity to such children who once lived in silence.