My boyfriend never seems to have time for me

Relationships
By Chris Hart | Mar 25, 2023
My boyfriend is always busy (Photo: iStock)

Hi Chris,

My boyfriend never seems to have time for me. He rarely ever calls more than once a week, there is only the occasional night out, and somehow he always seems too busy for me.

Should I wait for him to get closer? Or what?

No Time for Me

Chris says,

Hi No Time for Me!

I think you should move on. Because if a relationship is not right in its early days, there is a little chance things will improve. Best to cut your losses and find someone new. Okay, some happy relationships can be pretty low-key, but you still need to decide whether he is a possible quickly.

So forget real no-hopers within a date or two. After that, ask yourself whether he is treating you right and whether you feel relaxed and comfortable around one another. Within a couple of months, you should establish whether you both want your relationship to be exclusive.

Because if he still feels it is okay to chat up with other women after you have started to feel you are an item, then you have got a problem. It means he is most likely not thinking of you as a long-term partner.

Above all, if he does not call and seems reluctant to spend much time with you, then he is not all that into you. Whatever excuses he makes, it is none of those things. A man who is in love is never too busy, so you should not have to chase a boyfriend who is genuinely attracted to you.

You should feel happy, loved and cherished. So if you do not, ask yourself whether you are only together because you do not want to be alone. Because love is about the real world. It is not just a mushy feeling, it is about give-and-take and working together towards common goals.

Sharing emotions and enjoying each other's company. Being able to depend on each other through thick and thin. Above all, a man has to care for you deeply if you are going to be happy together.

Finding out whether he does is what courting is all about. And your man does not seem to be passing that test.

All the best,

Chris

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