"Motherhood should not 'cramp' a woman's lifestyle," Ann says. "While having a baby is life-changing, a happy mother is one who has a wholesome and well-balanced lifestyle. When a child ends up taking up all your time, emotions, energy and money, then you end up detesting motherhood. A child should not lower the quality of your life but should be a blessing in many other ways."
She adds: "As a woman, you should be conscious that you are whole even without a child and actively seek to enjoy life. There is nothing wrong with treating yourself to good things or going on holiday. Remember, a happy mother equals a happy child and home."
Family life experts say that while motherhood may take a parent by surprise, especially if the pregnancy was unplanned, there is no reason to let go of all the fun as that would make the mother feel as if bringing up the child is a burden to be tolerated rather a noble assignment to be enjoyed.
BeautyHub, the online platform that challenges outdated notions of beauty advises: "Before children, you were a whole other person with routines that were aligned with your career, mood or whatever floated your boat. While most of that life went out of the window when you became a mom, there's no reason to let it all go."
But a mother will let go of the fun to avoid the overly judgmental attitude adopted by our society that has stereotyped a woman who dares go against the 'norm'. It will use the same mirror it has used for decades against the mother who chooses to work full-time rather than be a stay-at-home mum.
Faith Gichanga, an organisational counsellor says it is all about striking a balance in life, that a mother cannot choose one over the other and that the hallmarks of a good mother go beyond child rearing but investing in self-care.
She says when a mother of boys takes care of herself, she is teaching them that motherhood is worth it. Such boys, in turn, will grow up respecting girls and later on, their wives, should they choose to marry.
"Society never sets specific expectations for a person who attains a PHD, yet a woman must conform to some unwritten societal expectations because she is a mother," says Gichanga. "Some mature people, especially older women in rural areas, think their values should be adopted by the younger mothers regardless of changing lifestyles. The young mothers may try to conform just to please their superiors."
According to Gichanga, a woman may feel that completely giving up her life for the children is what makes her a good mother. "A mother does not need to suffer to fulfil her role as a mother. Some married women, out of frustration, become angry at the father because he is out there talking to other men while she is 'imprisoned' by the child. She feels they must all suffer together."
But for a mother to invest in any self-care that includes intermittent bouts of fun-filled activities, she needs a strong support system.
Cheryl Mwangi, a counselling psychologist with Kidsalive Kenya says sometimes women never really know what they are signing up to when they start the motherhood journey. She says such 'luxuries' only come when the serious support system includes an intentional dad and financial security.
"Honestly it is high time mothers accepted that they cannot have it all," she says. "Some things have to give. For those enjoying the bikini body and coastal trips, chances are they are co-parenting with a highly functional man, not dead-beat dads and narcissists. Otherwise, a lot of mothers will always put their children first."
And while a mother's body may not always feel like skipping about, one thing is sure: take a break before you break.