How do I win a man romantically? (Photo: iStock)

Hi Chris,

I meet some gorgeous men, and our dates generally go well. But somehow things often fizzle out. Is it because I am not forthright enough? How do I make sure they know when I want to go further? 

Green Light

 Chris says,

Hi Green Light!

You certainly cannot say anything, which is quite off-putting. It is better to signal your feelings with gestures and facial expressions.


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Like whenever you are looking at someone, your eyes naturally centre on their face. To begin with, just catch his eyes briefly, and then look down with a hint of embarrassment. But as the evening progresses, look into his eyes for longer.

And if you are beginning to get the hots for a guy, your eyes should start drifting over his body as well. Smile lots, a bit shy to begin with, but more and more openly as things warm up. All around the world, those are universal signals that say you are keen.

A natural, happy smile also says that you are enjoying his company. Especially if you relax your lower lip slightly so he gets a glimpse of your teeth.

Touch your face, mouth or hair. Slightly tilt your head as you look at him, perhaps biting your lower lip. And do not pick at your food. Because showing that you have a good appetite suggests you will be just as enthusiastic in bed.

From time to time let your gaze linger on his lips a little longer. He will subconsciously start thinking about kissing you. As your feelings for him grow your eyes will open wide. This is why dining by candlelight is so romantic because your pupils dilate in the dim light.

You will also blink more, so deliberately raise your blink rate just a tiny bit and see if he does the same. If he does, he is feeling good about being with you too.

There are other signs that something good is happening. Like you will see his eyebrows rise, his pupils dilate, his lips part and his nostrils flare slightly. Get the idea? It is all about signals. So just relax and let your face communicate what you feel.

All the best,