Most men believe they are extremely good in bed. Look, it’s a scandal to make such an assumption. Gentlemen, you might not be as good as you think! But wait, being bad in bed doesn’t mean you can’t improve. But first, you have to admit you aren’t good enough for you to improve.

Problem is, one can’t tell whether they are good or bad. It’s unlikely that your lady is going to give you detailed report each and every time you engage in the act. To discern if your bedroom game needs improvement, you have to pay close attention to small signals she gives. Trust us: It’s better to figure it now, than to realise when she dumps you.

9. You are only ‘good’ after drinking

We know a lot of guys get off on bragging about how many different conquests they’ve enjoyed. But at a certain point, you have to ask yourself, “How come they don’t stick around?”

If she doesn’t come back for a repeat performance, we’d recommend you step your game up. You know, before you run out of girls to buy drinks. Just say no to using alcohol as a crutch.

8. She complains you gave her a backache

If she says it hurts at any point or is walking like a cowboy on the way to a stand-off after you’re finished, don’t pat yourself on the back. It isn’t because you are hung like a horse (you probably aren’t, that’s just simple statistics).

It might be because you’re an insensitive lover. This thing is about rhythm. Don’t go thrusting away like a piston and assume she’s enjoying herself. Get in tune with your lady. Does she want power humping, or would she prefer something a little slower and sweeter? Chances are, it’s the latter.

7. You’re fat and she is always on top

Gentlemen, all good things in life take work. Just like you need to hit the gym if you want to get that six pack, and you actually need to read a book if you want to be a quality conversationalist, you must also work at sex if you want to be halfway decent at it. We aren’t asking you to try the “double reverse lotus” next time you bring a girl home, but at least try a move besides the “slumbering log.”

6. You think you’re an adult film star

Before you start spanking her, checking yourself out in the mirror like the Sauti Sol boys in Nishike mode, ask yourself a question: is this really what she wants?

While adult entertainers make a living treating each other’s bodies like objects, most women don’t enjoy being treated that way. Perhaps looking a woman in the eye or embracing her tenderly makes you feel far less macho than riding her like a rodeo bull, but one of those moves is going to get you invited back, and it isn’t the cowboy act.

5. If she gives a lot of instructions

“Oh, baby. Right there. No wait, there. No, over there.” These are not accolades, these are instructions. If she is in a place where she can play the part of air-traffic controller, you might not be doing everything you can to get her up in the air.

If she is moaning anything but “yes!” or your name (if it is someone else’s name, you have other problems), then you should listen up, and start taking notes. Yes, it will be on the test.

4. If she likes asking, “Is there anything you want done differently?”

If she asks if she’s doing something wrong, the subtext is: “Something is off here. I’m not enjoying myself. How do we fix this?” Rather than giving her a report card on her performance, get a little introspective.

Tell her she’s great, and ask her if there’s anything you can do to make her feel better. Then, adjust your technique accordingly. Even some of the greatest strategies don’t always work in the field. There is no shame in switching up your game.

3. She tells you how ‘good’ you are

The more often she tells you how good you are, the more likely it is you actually suck. We all appreciate it when a lady rolls over in bed, turns to you, and sighs, “That was so great.” But, the trouble comes when they say it again and again. Think of it like a job interview. If they tell you more than once how perfect an applicant you are, odds are, they are going to hire someone else.

2. She asks if “That’s it?”

Okay, she probably isn’t going to ask you that, but if it lasted less than ten minutes, you know she’s thinking it. Trust us, there are many dudes out there who finish to quickly. Well, sometimes it happens, and there’s not much you can do about it.

If you’re one of those guys, maybe you should focus on quality foreplay beforehand.

1. She doesn’t moan or fakes it

Yeah, you might feel that her moaning isn’t really important, but sorry to burst your bubble, it is. Moaning is just an expression of how she really feels inside, if she doesn’t moan then she doesn’t feel anything inside.

You know when she’s faking it, you just don’t want to admit it to yourself. Maybe she moans too loud, or not loud enough, and she doesn’t go slightly cross-eyed like she usually does.

It’s OK if you don’t get her off every time (as long as you’ve made an effort). But if it becomes a habit, she might upgrade to someone who can.