Emotional dependency arises when individuals struggle to meet their emotional needs independently, instead leaning on others, often a partner, to fulfil most, if not all, of those needs.
In romantic relationships, it's common to seek out a partner first for support and reassurance, particularly in long-term commitments where emotional bonds run deep.
But what about those who aren’t in romantic relationships? Those who rarely engage in conversations with others? Where do they turn for comfort, understanding, or just a listening ear?
After speaking with several of my peers, I started to understand why many prefer confiding in AI rather than in fellow human beings. For many, it started as early as high school, where teachers randomly appointed as guidance counsellors were tasked with addressing students’ emotional issues.
The problem? Many lacked the proper qualifications. Some even breached confidentiality, casually discussing sensitive issues with other teachers. At just 17 or less, trust in adults was already being dismantled.
“Talk to a friend,” they say. But friends often tell you what you want to hear, not what you need to hear. Worse, there’s always the lingering fear that what you share will be passed on to others. Have you ever had a fallout with a close friend who knew everything about your life? Have you ever been hurt when they used your vulnerabilities against you? That kind of betrayal stings.
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And what about opening up to parents? Many young people avoid this because they feel their parents won’t understand. The generational gap, shaped by rapidly changing technology and evolving social norms, creates a divide in values and perspectives.
Sharing everything might feel like a threat to one’s autonomy. For Gen Z, maintaining some emotional independence is a way of asserting identity and control over their lives.
Sometimes, talking to someone doesn’t change anything. Instead, it adds more weight to their shoulders and yours. You get vague, cliché responses like “It’s going to get better,” or “All will be well.” We forget that even the strongest people get tired. They begin to withdraw, make excuses and drift away. And just like that, a once-strong connection fades into silence.
It’s no wonder Kenya ranks among the top countries in AI usage. But here’s the twist: the CEO of a major AI company recently confirmed that information shared with AI could be used in court. The illusion of safety is slowly dissolving. Every time we interact with AI, we’re feeding it data conversations that might be stored, analysed, or even compromised in a breach.
AI lacks genuine emotion. It doesn’t truly know what it feels like to be heartbroken, overjoyed, or confused. It draws from data, not from lived experience. So while it may offer advice or a comforting response, it can’t pick up on the nuances of human emotion. It doesn’t “get” you the way a person does.
Over-reliance on AI for emotional companionship can have real consequences. You might begin to struggle with forming or maintaining real-life relationships. The ability to read body language, interpret social cues, and resolve conflict, skills essential for human interaction, can start to fade.
Emotional validation from AI may feel satisfying in the moment, but in the long run, it could lead to deeper isolation.
As AI continues to evolve, it's crucial to reflect on the ethical and psychological impact of developing emotional ties with something that can’t truly feel. In the quest to be heard and understood, we must not lose sight of the irreplaceable value of human connection.