I met my wife in 2012 and we have two children. I am in business and struggle to run two enterprises which have not stabilised but are getting there. My wife is in charge of one of them and, unfortunately, she is not doing well at that. She prefers to stay at home and often manages the business on phone despite the fact that our children are all in school now and we have a house help.

She just lazes around the house watching Nigerian movies and only goes to check on the business in the evening or after a day or two. She is the direct opposite of what I was looking for in a wife because I have always wanted someone who would be more of a business partner than a house wife. She thinks we are very rich just because we have a car and can afford a good life in an expensive neighbourhood. I need someone who shares in my vision and who will help me attain it. Please advise me on what I should do - I am seriously considering leaving because I don't want to die poor. {Marcus}

Marriage is a life-long commitment and requires a great deal of forethought. Getting married without a plan and without any forethought is a terrible decision. If your wife does not provide, you should not force her to. However, you could encourage her to try and be more active in developing the family. Also try and identify what she is good at and nurture that.

{Andrew Didy Chaplin}

There is no perfect human Being. Nobody has ever lived the fullest of his or her life. You knew what you wanted but had not expressed that to her. She is behaving like this because you have given her all the comfort she needs. Discuss your expectations with her also hear her side of the story. Help her to appreciate your targets and the plans for the family.

{Ouma Ragumo}

You seem to be doing your best to see that your family gets the best in future but she does not see it this way. Talk to her to also get to understand her thinking in this. If she does not change, remember that she is still your loving wife and mother to your children. You may also look for a qualified manager to run the business on your behalf.

{Fred Jausenge}

Matters business may not necessarily subscribe to family aspirations. You already know her weakness, meaning you can sort it out. Get someone, an employee with business acumen, to help you run the business. I want to believe she met your basic requirements for a wife and this is much more important than the ability to run a business.

{Tasma Saka}

She seems to like more of leisure than working. Talk to your wife or find a friend to talk to her. Maybe she just does not know how to manage a business so you may also consider taking her for some training. As for the businesses, you may also hire somebody to manage them on your behalf. However, you should also be honest and firm with her about running the businesses well and see if she will change.

{Onyango Outha}