Why am I eyeing other men? (Photo: iStock)

Hi Chris,

My feelings for my husband vary a lot. One week we are cosy, the next I find him annoying.

And when I am annoyed, I start eyeing up all the other men in my life. Why do I do that? Am I nuts or something?

Mad Moods

Chris says,

Hi Mad Moods!


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You are not nearly as much in control of your life as you think, and a perfect example of that is how your monthly cycle affects you and your husband.

Men are subconsciously aware when a woman’s ovulating and it affects their behaviour, though they do not know why. So, for example, American lap dancers get much higher tips at that time of the month! 

Men find a women’s voice more appealing around that time, and her smell seems more inviting.

She is more likely to go to places where she might meet men, she dresses more attractively and shows more skin. Though everything is quite subtle, and nothing you would comment on out loud.

Her appetite decreases, she becomes more physically and socially active, and more competitive towards other women, and even happily married women start to notice other men and flirt with them.

She will be more critical of her husband, feel less close to him, and is more likely to say yes if another male approaches her. Especially if he is highly masculine and sexy.

Not surprisingly, husbands became more jealous, possessive and suspicious of their wives during their fertile days, and that can be annoying!

So that is probably what is happening to you! You still love your husband, but your subconscious is urging you to look at other men. Because a secret fling with a sexy man might produce a child who will have a better chance of doing well in life.

So you are not nuts. It is just your subconscious trying to lead you astray! Fortunately, you are actually in control of all this, now that you know what is going on. So in future try looking at your husband, and your moods, in a new light. He is not being deliberately annoying, it is just your subconscious giving him a hard time.

All the best,