Margaret and Edson Bogonko celebrate everyday with their limbless one-year-old daughter christened — Blessed Nyaboke Bogonko.
“Baby Blessed is a blessing to us. We love her more than the other children and we consider her first in everything that we do. During meal times, we ensure that she is the first to be served. She is a celeb in the family,” says Margaret.
Though limbless, Blessed is impossibly adorable. She is jovial and playful despite her condition.
She has miraculously hit several milestones for a toddler.
“When I leave her on the bed or sofa and put something beside her, she manages to grab it with her tiny feet,” says Margaret with pride.
Due to her condition, Margaret says many visitors have flocked their home to encourage and bring gifts for the baby.
BLESSED IS A BLESSING
“Baby Blessed has brought us so many blessings. We get very many visitors who shower her with all manner of gifts. We are all proud of her as a family and we love her very much,” says Margaret.
Unlike other people who conceal physically-challenged infants or even go ahead to do the unimaginable so as to avoid the tasking responsibilities that comes with raising such a child, Margaret and her husband have stood firm and vowed to do everything to ensure that their last born daughter enjoys the rights she deserves.
They have registered her under Person’s Living with Disabilities, which saw her get a special wheelchair recently, donated by Kenya Re through The Niko Fiti Campaign that is sponsored by The Standard Group.
But it was not a smooth sail accepting their daughter’s condition.
Baby blessed story is one of triumph, courage and hope amid despair.
When she was expectant — like all mothers — Margaret was expecting to get a normal child. But one day during a visit to the antenatal clinic, the doctors noticed something unusual.
“After a scan, the doctor picked something unusual and told me that there was a possibility that I would give birth to a baby without limbs. I did not think much of it,” Margaret recalls.
Some of her friends whom she had earlier informed about the doctor’s report, advised her to procure an abortion or give birth in a faraway place and pay someone to kill the new born.
She had not fathomed the news of the baby’s deformity until she gave birth.
SHOCK AND PAIN
When Blessed was born, the news came with shock and pain that was overwhelming.
“When I was shown the limbless baby, I cried uncontrollably. I did not even know how to breast feed her. I thought of abandoning her in hospital, but I could not go home without her. I called my husband and told him what had happened,” the mother of six recalls. The news was also a blow to her husband.
She was in denial for several months.
“It was so painful. There were days I wished the baby could just die and leave me in peace,” she says.
When they realised the baby was here to stay, she and her hubby started the endless journey of trying to find help to rectify the baby’s condition.
“We visited many help facilities to ask whether there was a way the baby could be helped. Everywhere we went, we were told their was nothing they could do,” says Blessed’s father.
SANK INTO DEPRESSION
For three months, Margaret sank into depression and had difficulties taking meals and sleeping.
“I cried everyday when I looked at the helpless baby. I did not know what to do with her. When visitors came to see her, I wanted to hide her because I knew they would ask questions that I had no answers to. Tears could not stop rolling down my face every time I undressed her. She looked so fragile,” says Margaret.
Her husband was equally depressed and stopped going to church or social gatherings.
Whenever they went to the hospital, the medics just told them to take their baby home and raise her like any other kid.
BREAKTHROUGH
A breakthrough came when one day the couple travelled to their rural home in Kisii to take the baby for visiting.
“The news about our limbless baby spread like bush fire. People flocked our home for a whole week from the entire region to witness this. People postponed their chores to come and check this interesting baby,” says Margaret.
The comments that came with it were crushing, — from witchcraft allegations to the possibility of a curse.
“We realised that our daughter had so many enemies and the best thing was to defend her. She needed us to be strong for her, not weak,” Margaret says.
It was there and then that the couple decided that they were going to stand up and defend their daughter from all the harshness of life.
From then on, they stopped the pity party and became baby Blessed’s protectors and defenders.
“We decided that we were going to pour love to the baby just as she is. We even decided that we were going to champion for rights of children with disability. Now we love our daughter and she is the best thing that happened to us. Her five siblings also adore her,” the father says with pride.
Baby Blessed is now one and half years old and everything is going on well. They have had to overcome a lot of challenges and the couple says they have come to terms with it and the children have also named the baby Angel.
CELEB BABY
“Every evening after school, my children fight for the baby. Every one wants to hold her,” says Margaret.
“My children take turns to look after her since no house help can handle her needs. When the kids come from school, they do their homework very fast so that they can help me hold the baby,” Margaret says.
Another couple that has learned to love and stand by their child who has disability is Pastor George Bosire and his wife Grace Nanchama from Utawala.
Light Siamani Nyakundi, their three-year-old daughter, has cerebral palsy.
“It takes the grace of God to raise a child with disabilities. This is beyond human ability,” Pastor George says.
He says society judges harshly and even stigmatises a child with disability and it takes strong parents to bring up such a child with confidence and conviction.
“Because of her condition, our baby was rejected in most baby care centres. But we have stood by her and my wife takes care of her so that she gets special attention,” says George.
Indeed it is commendable how parents of Blessed and Light have stood beside them to defend and protect them from the harsh realities of life.