I have been doing some serious soul searching. I have realised I have been in chamas that have added no value to my life. After doing a thorough reality check, I decided that I am better off without such chamas.
For instance, there was this group I was in which comprised women we schooled with. That chama was more about class and social status. When we met, the agenda mostly bordered on gossiping and showing off.
When we met at somebody's house, the talk centred on who had bought a new car, whose was moving to their new house blah blah blah. We also gossiped about ex-classmates who were having an affair, who was divorcing their hubby yada yada. But this year, I want to discuss more thought-provoking issues.
After that sober reality check, this year I have relinquished my membership from chamas that do not add value. And if the need arises for me to join another chama, it must meet the following basic minimum requirements:
An agenda: My previous chamas had no agenda. We basically used to meet and discuss issues spontaneously. If it happened that somebody's house girl has become a drama queen, that day's main agenda would be "the way house helps are nowadays a headache." But this year, I want a chama that has an agenda worth discussing. My kind of agenda is new investment opportunities, where to get good bargains, career progression strategies, parenting strategies etc.
A vision: When a group of educated working class mamas meet, I think their vision should be more than buying dishes and house hold items. I am looking to join a group with a vision like, "a group of women driven by passion and purpose to better their lives and that of the surrounding community."
I want me a group whose vision is not just to enrich the lives of the members but also to give back to the society. Tied in with a vision, should be the group's short-term and long-term agenda. One long term goal should be to ensure all women in the group are home owners and investors in the next five to ten years.
A constitution: When a group has no rules that bind the members, anything goes. In my previous group there were no rules and because of that there was a lot of indiscipline. There was a lot of laxity and laziness especially when it comes to time keeping and meeting attendance. This time round, I am hoping to either join or form a group which has some basic ground rules to instill order and discipline in the members.
Few but focused members: I was in one group that had so many members whenever we met; it was like a small market place. Many members can be unruly and un-tamable. With that big group, few members share and believe in the group's vision, if any. Another disadvantage of a big group is that managing the members can be tricky. If I am to join a group, I want it to have five members who share in the vision.