For some reason, I always have luck with good house-helps. Unlike some of my friends and many other career women, my house helps stay for long (by long I mean years). On the other hand, I have friends who cannot last a full month with a house help. They are forever in the process of acquiring a new girl, releasing the old one or training the new one.

When my friends come to my place for chama meetings instead of finding a new face like I always do when I go to their places, it is always my good old Mwende.

When they see her they always tease: "You still have this Kamba girl. What charm have you given her?"

So what charm is this that I use? I will share. But first I must put a disclaimer that there are some girls who are naturally rogue, so these rules do not apply to them. And once in a while most women land on a rogue girl. That settled, here goes:

Treat her well - with dignity and respect: I always treat my girls like a distant relative. That way there are boundaries and the level of respect is maintained. That means they sleep well and eat well just like the rest of the family. Some women treat their house girls like servants or slaves, they sleep in places that resemble pig sty and eat cold left overs. If you treat her that way, expect the same inhuman treatment when she is left alone with your baby.

Pay her well and on time: Just like us, house girls also feel it when the monthly pay delays. If you keep paying her after 10 of the next month do not expect that she will deliver to her best.

Give her off every week: Many of us career women work six or five days a week then we are given an off or two. This is basically your right. So it should follow that you give your house girl at least a day to rest, do her stuff and just breath fresh air.

Teach your kids to respect her and treat her well: Treating her with respect means not shouting at her aimlessly in front of the kids. Just imagine your boss giving you a dress down in front of your colleagues. It's very demeaning.

Once in a while spoil her. Occasional shop for her and see how her heart melts.

Talk to her, engage her: Has it ever occurred to you that she also has a family? So once in a while ask her how they are. It always feels warm when someone asks you, "How is your family doing?"

Most importantly before you search for a girl, because of the possibility that you could land on a rogue one, pray and ask God to give you a nice, loving, respectful girl.