From when we came back from ‘Fast cation’ (vacation) two weeks ago, my Daddy he has been so funny.
‘Right,’ he said, ‘Baby Drago will be 4 in another four months. Must start prepping him for PP1.’
What does my Daddy mean? I am not the pee pee one! I stopped peeing in bed, and even in my potty. These days I pee straight into the toilets for grown-ups. Any hoo, from the Tuesday of December One, my Daddy has putted me on a ‘timed table,’ even with nanny Alicia. After I wake up, she changes me from night clothes (bunny/frog/kangaroo) to normal day clad. Then on one day I eat winter Bics for breakfast (yum) and next day I’m forced to drink uji (yuck).
9 - 10am cartoon time
I watch ‘Paw Patrol,’ which is for six puppies going to The Rescue when someone is in trouble and says ‘Help me!’ Then after that it is Paddington, whose song we sing with Daddy as he goes: ‘Paddington, Paddington Beeeaaarrr, he came from Meru, to be with me and you ...’
10-11am tablet
My Mummy bought me a ‘Baby Tablet’ on her birthday. I was so happy. But Daddy says ‘staki toto akuwe zoom bee wa tech ...’ So Baby only gets one hour with it in the morning.
11-Noon kids and play
My bestest time of the day, because my nine-year-old sister Milan takes me out to play. She plays roller skates with her eight-year-old friend Nia, and Baby Drago plays with Nia’s little sister, Aida. Aida is three, like me. Also, very pretty!
Noon-1pm home school king
I always cry when Alicia comes to beba me ‘chaa nguvu’ to go and do my ‘home school king.’ But once I sit down on the desk that Daddy bought me, I love to do my colours and numbers.
1 – 2pm sasa ni lunch-time?
Alicia sits me down to feed me lunch, as we watch the singing ‘Bubble Guppies,’ Peppa Pig family (which is just like mummy, daddy, Milan and me) and, finally, Blue’s Clues.
2 – 4pm ZZZ
After this, I’m so sleepy. My Aunty Philo she takes me to ‘bed roon’ and tells me scary stories of ‘Karagacha’ as I slip to siesta.
4-5pm trucks
It’s time to go to the sitting room and play with my trucks and construction blocks. Ever when I tolded my Daddy that ‘Baby want to be engineer’ (after I sawed a caterpillar outside our house), he keeps buying toy trucks and blocks, and mutters darkly: ‘Sasa vile Uhururu ametuuza, we utacheza game yako huko juu na wa Chinku, kijana.’
5-6pm story time at the balcony
Like clockwork at 5 pm, here comes my Daddy to quickly put trucks and blocks away. We go to the balcony, and we start to read through so many story books. ‘Riding Hood,’ ‘Magic Porridge Pot,’ ‘Three Billy Goats,’ ‘See Otto,’ ‘Amarillo of Armadillo,’ ‘Bad Kitty Meets Baby.’ Until I have even started seeing the three billy goats and bad kitty in dreams!
6-7pm, cartoons again
After the ‘msomo,’ where Daddy asks me so many questions, and gives me lollipops for getting stories right and remembered, I am rewarded with relaxation – another hour of cartoons. ‘Top Wing,’ ‘Blaze and the Monster Machines’ and ‘Rusty Rivets.’ Funny my Daddy sits with me for this hour too, to point out engineering in these three toons. When Baby Drago is BIG, he will build roads and railways, own ‘Drago Contraction Company.’
7pm mummy’s home
My mummy’s work finishes at six and she comes in door at 7pm, with small yummies. I hug her and shout colours: ‘Your hair is black, your teeth is white, your eye one is black, one is brown.’ My Mummy laugh and say, ‘very good, my baby. And what colour is my skin?’ ‘YELLOW!’ Baby shouts, as Daddy laughs and says: ‘Mummy sio yellow yellow. She is chocolate.’
evewoman@standardmedia.co.ke