I am 32, single and happy with my life. I am in love with a Catholic priest and we have been in a relationship for the past two years. During that period our love has just become deeper and deeper.
I am also a Catholic and I realised that I am making a big mistake and sinning against God and the church. I have since repented and asked God for the forgiveness. Now, the problem is that this priest doesn’t want to let go of me. He says that he loves me too much. I want to forget everything and start afresh. I once told him to decide between serving God or me and he asked for some time to think but I don’t know what to do in the event that he still wants to continue with me. What should aI do?
{Linda}
Your take:
Linda, sex is a human basic need that no man can do without and that is why the priest doesn’t want to let you go. Remember priests are not allowed to marry, and when this comes to light he will lose his job and you will be hurt. That man is wasting your time!
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{Luke Omondi}
You are both lying to yourselves and that relationship is for lust not love. What future do you have with a priest? If I were you, I would have walked out yesterday.
Ogara George
Linda, it is good that you are aware that your relationship with a priest is sinful. Put your foot down and tell the priest to confess and concentrate on his work. He is wasting your time and you can imagine the scandal it will get you into and the consequent dent to your integrity!
{Tasma Charles}
He should choose between you and the church. If not, tell him to stop bothering you or you will spill the beans. He should be setting a good example to society.
{Kamau Beka - Mumias}
Now that you know that what you are doing is sinful, stop it immediately. If this is too hard — now that you are both in love — tell him to marry you so that you can have sex in the right set up, which is marriage.
{Gerald}
Remind this man of God that he cannot have his cake and eat it. Advise him to resign, marry you and serve God within the family setup. But if that is not possible end the relationship immediately.
{Ignatius Odhiambo}
Please leave the man of God alone and move on with your life. To ask the priest to decide between you and God is blasphemous. You made the right decision to repent. Stand by your decision, and the priest will respect you.
{Madende Magwiru}
What you are doing is wrong and both of you are aware that it is wrong to date a Catholic priest. If he loves you let him denounce his priesthood and marry you. There’s no love there! Leave that priest to work for God.
{Benson Indimuli}
Thank God you asked him to choose between dating you and serving God. I am sure after careful thought he will choose serving God. If he chooses you then simply reject him because that relationship will be evil!
{Christian Prince, TZ}
Dear Linda, confront this man and ask him to make a final choice between marrying you and continuing with his priesthood. There is no sin if he abandons being a priest and continues being a faithful Christian and getting married if he truly is in love with you.
{Oyoo Wycklife}
Linda this man has put you in a difficult situation. He wants to have you and his priesthood at the same time. This kind of relationship is addictive and a sin before God. Repent again and confess to the church what is going on to shame the priest.
Merely saying no is not enough to sort out this mess.
{Ochieng George}
He is cheating you, the entire church and God. One should be a Catholic by deeds, not by words. I know that you really love him but remember that if he can cheat on God he can cheat on you as well. He should respect his celibacy vows or quit altogether. These are the men of God who are spoiling the good name of the Church.
{Bernard Oluande}
My take:
Where is he coming from?
A good number of women are not only sexually and romantically involved with ‘celibate priests’ but are also raising families for them. This means that some priests are living double lives.
By all means they are not to blame; if you look at it critically, they were men before they became priests.
No need to make him choose
So you are both in love but he is in active service. This is not a bad thing but making him choose between you and serving God is rather unfair.
Maybe you could help him find the right thing to do by looking at the available options. Priests who have found it difficult to remain under the celibacy vows have stepped aside gotten married and continued serving.
If he is from the mainstream Church, there is a breakaway faction that allows its priests to marry and continue in active service. To a priest, his service is his life and now that he may have fallen in love with you, you are his life, so asking him to choose between you and the Church is putting him between a rock and a hard place.
How genuine is he?
The most important thing in all this is to ascertain to what degree he is serious with you. As a matter of fact, he may be telling the same story to a dozen other women out there.
If he is serious with you he should not just declare what his intentions are about his priesthood, but should also appear to take steps towards making it happen for both of you.
He may just be wasting your time and using you until he gets a younger and more beautiful woman.
He should put his money where his mouth is and not just keep telling you how much he wants and needs you. It may not be you he really needs; it maybe what you have that he really, really needs.
{Taurus}
