Twice in my life women have dismissed me because I wanted a serious relationship with them. It used to be that it is men who suffered commitment phobia but the modern woman is just as susceptible to developing.

This is especially after a break up with a man who looked and sounded so promising at the beginning but inevitably disappointed her. Lately, I am meeting women who do not want a serious relationship. They just need a man to enjoy a few moments with and walk away from at will. It is a frightening prospect for men.

So how do you tell that a woman is not ready for a serious relationship? It is easy:

1. Goes on partying

If after a month of dating, she has not made any adjustment to her lifestyle, just enjoy the ride. I am referring to women who will drink the whole night away, party from weekend to weekend with no sign of slowing down. That is a sign of a woman not ready to take dating seriously.

Women who want a relationship tend to adjust as quickly as a prospective boyfriend or potential husband shows up. Even if it means pretending, they always try to adjust to meet the expectations of a good girlfriend.

2. Not clingy

Women after a relationship tend to be clingy to different extents. If she rarely questions what you are up to in the course of the day or rarely questions your every move, then she too, does not want to be bothered by you. Just enjoy the ride.

3. Avoids the talk’

If she does not want any talk about the relationship, then she has it worked out to the date she will dump you. Beware.

4. Values her independence

By and large, women always relinquish part of their freedom for them to be taken up by a man. It is the way the society works. If she insists on doing everything on her terms, then she is not quite keen on being some man’s girlfriend. I do not mean that independence is a bad thing, but there are those simple rules like who should leave the night club earlier than the other, or even prepare a decent meal despite her schedule in her corporate job. A woman after a serious relationship will try to adjust to a man’s whims, or even pretend to, as she works to restore her independence within the relationship, should it work.

5. Never responds to calls or texts promptly

A love-struck woman should suffocate you with a million calls and a thousand text messages. If your woman takes forever and a day to reply your morning text and has a stupid excuse for her poor communication skills, cut the short the relationship, she is not into you at all.

6. No sense of the future

If she is not keen on future plans, she is only interested in a short ride. Most women especially after 20 have a sense of the future and what they want, if she does not broach up the subject, too bad. Run.

7. Not proud to introduce you to friends

A woman who wants a relationship will be quick to introduce you to her pals, if only for a quick appraisal on you from them. If she’d rather die than introduce you to her female friends or even family, she will be dumping you very soon. Be cautious.

When was the last time you wrote someone a letter on paper?