I am a Fourth Year student at the university, and I am in love with a classmate (also my best friend) whom I have adored since we first met in 2010. She is, however, engaged but she says her relationship is wanting. She says she regrets having not walked out earlier. For a month now, we have been doing literally everything together (except sex) with the hope that she will quit the other relationship so we can start dating. Recently, I went through her phone messages and learnt things are as perfect as can be with the other guy. I have showered her with gifs and taken her out. I really love her and she says she likes me a lot, but I am not sure what I should do about this. Please advice...
{Desmond}
Your take
It is good your friend is so sincere and frank that she has told you her initial relationship is weak and unpalatable. Take advantage of that and place a knife on the things that hold your friend with her guy together. Slowly but surely, they will fall apart and it will be your turn to take over.
{Motelyot}
You should have known by now that you are dealing with a dishonest ingrate. Don’t be surprised when you find out that the other guy is being told worse things about you. She is a gold digger, so the best thing is to be honest with her and let her know what you got from her phone. Study her body language as you discuss this, and you will know exactly where you stand with her.
{Tasma Charles}
Whether this lady’s relationship is wanting or not, the fact remains that she’s engaged. Why would you want to break someone’s engagement? Would you be happy if you were the other guy? She’s after your money, so it’s time you woke up and looked for a genuine girl.
{Ben Shikuku}
Out of many marriage experiences and outcomes, those who marry their lovers end up divorcing, separating or living a miserable life. Therefore, if your relationship with this woman is casual, it is okay. But if you intend to marry her, you will be in for disappointment. This lady is cheating on either or both of you. Look for another woman before it is too late.
{Onyango Outha}
Not having terminated her previous relationship means she is still interested in it. Outings and gifts never buy love. You are just keeping her company. Stop meddling in her affairs and get your own girl. If she is the cause of friction in the other relationship, expect the same in your relationship with her.
{Ouma Ragumo}
Counsellor’s take
Desmond,
Rule number one — do not date a girl you consider to be your best friend and rule number two, if your girlfriend keeps telling you she is going to quit her current relationship to be with you, then you can rest assured that the only likely person to quit in that arrangement is you. Yes, things are as perfect as can be between them and she is only in this because she loves being showered with gifts and being taken out just like every other campus girl does.
To her, the only way to keep the favours flowing is to dangle a carrot and make sure you never get a bite so you keep following her around. This explains why she is withholding the sex. Lastly, a Fourth Year lady student is way ahead of you in terms of her thoughts and thought processes. This means she will always outrun you and as such, you may not get a fair share in the relationship. Get a younger girl and leave this one alone as those fantasies and ideas you have about her shall remain only that — fantasies and ideas.
{Taurus}