My week was just fine, thanks for asking. I don’t know about you but in my world men are still at it, you know; filling the camp with hot air, insulting each other from one end to the other and generally trading banalities while doing as little work as possible.
Money, the only agenda on their list of discussions has never been more elusive! Wengine kama Theuri thinks wali rogwa na mrogi aka kufa! Wanaomba tu za konyagi zipatikane! For others, Sportpesa is their ticket out of poverty, they swear by their flat tyres and empty pockets.
When things are this giant, every man fights his own devils best way he knows how! Personally, I’m wearing my silly face walking around like one bemused by his own fart. Don’t ask.
And talking of devils, Baba Eugene must be having a taste of things, giant things at that. Clearly, he’s a troubled man but won’t tell. Thing is, the fellow is married with two kids, that is, to the best of our knowledge, but grapevine has another version altogether.
Word doing rounds has it that the chap has at least eight children with eight different women! How now?
Meanwhile, the fellow had disappeared for two days without communicating and so being the good neighbour he is, under the nyumba kumi initiative, Theuri decided to fulfill his civic duty and dropped by his place. And that’s when he stumbled on to the news!
Upon arrival, Theuri, naturally a loud man who doesn’t care for anyone or anything in particular, says he was shocked to find his equally loud cohort recoiled and holed up in a cocoon of sorts on the sofa with his wife breathing fire down his neck with one arm akimbo and the other jabbing at his head!
Nini mbaya Rose? Theuri, posed keeping a safe distance. Hakuna kitu mbaya Theuri, ni huyu rafiki yako ali dhani ataishi na hizi siri zake! Siri gani tena ameficha? Buda, nini mbaya? Looking at Baba Eugene. Mimi hata si elewi nini ina endelea Theuri, pengine uni saidie.
The fellow answered. Eee, wewe hata hujuangi nini huwa ina endelea, sindio? She retorted handing Theuri his phone. Soma, na ujue sio hiyo peke yake nimepata “Niko na ball yako na ujue kwa birth certificate naandika jina yako as the father!” the text read.
Now, I’m no Dr Phil or anything on these matters but I believe the man must have hit and run and now those chickens had come home to roost! Under the brotherhood code, Theuri was obligated to step in and fight for his kind but the technicalities were one too many to risk it.
First, the text, then the other allegations and finally the wife.
See, she’s a purebred straight from Nyeri — moto yakuotewa mbali. Need I say more?
