A friend had a sick parent at midnight, so he sought an ambulance and it drove the patient to the nearest hospital, which turned out to be a facility on the Eastern bypass. He arrived safely and reported to the reception.
He was promptly asked to raise a deposit of Sh400,000. No one had gone to assess the condition of the patient, but some doctor said she would need to go to the ICU.
I guess the medics there have specular gifts of diagnosing disease by smelling the air and determining the level of care needed by scanning the skies. But since my friend is not a magician, he insisted on a medic’s assessment of the patient.
One grudgingly went to the ambulance, and determined the patient did not require ICU care. A general ward would do. That needed a Sh200,000 deposit. Given that no banks open after midnight—they seldom do, unless there’s a heist at the National Youth Service— my friend mobilised some Sh100,000 in cash, and promised to deliver the rest by morning.
The hospital did not budge, so he left and went elsewhere, barely five kilometres away, where he received more humane and professional treatment.
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How did we ambulance chasers end up at the hospital? These sick hospitals require mercy killing.
