Going back to school is tedious for parents marooned in areas where flooding has wreaked havoc besides the usual spending; shopping and pocket money.
It gives most a migraine and most parents can’t wait for the breed to return back to school away from depleting food resources while idling around.
But their kids can’t also wait to leave the drudgery of home life and its domestic chores and reunite with class mates, the school cateress and canteen operator.
Here are 10 reasons kids yearn for back to school…
1. Hot campus teachers
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TP means ‘Teaching Practice’ mostly university students who come to teach in second term. They mostly dashing, young, vivacious.
They excite both boys and girls and many students have memories of salivating over them as a break from their usual boring odijos. TP makes mutation, tangents and thermo-chemistry bearable.
2. Hujaosha viombo?
School holidays are a major break from three months of morning preps, endless afternoon double lessons under the big mango tree coupled with the mean cane of Mr Tom the senior master.
Just why kids look forward to SpongeBob, Wi-Fi and their phones, but then mother goose always sashays home with “kwanini hujaosha viombo?” and house chores are a bore broken by back to school.
3. Fleecing mean parents
There is quick quid made telling your parents that you have been asked to return to school with non-existent provisions like three rims of photocopying paper, providing an opportunity for swindling cash from tightwad parents.
4. Domestic fights
Like the army worms eating stalks of maize across the country, domestic violence still breathes.
Its devilish breath hot as hell makes holidays unbearable for kids whose papa and mama should have joined Kenya Defence Forces…
5. Meeting Harriet again
For students gifted in extra-curriculum activities from the entrails of Busia, back to school is their one hope of seeing Harriet again- your forehead endowed girlfriend from that sister school who resides at the coast.
You can’t wait for the national music and drama festivals which will kutanisha the two of you.
6. Funkies galore
Second term has a string of extra curricula activities that are a bastion of illicit fun and a vacation of sorts from text books and a system that’s giving birth to louts.
Music festivals, basketball tournaments and other activities provide students with the chance to flirt, skip torturous physics classes and weevil riddled githeri.
7. Preening prefects
School prefects, those little cretins, are nobodies in their shags and hoods.
But in school, they have a ‘title’ and thus look forward to bullying lesser mortals, wielding obscene powers like police officers, governors and senators.
8. Damn, it’s second term
Second term is closer to finishing another grade of education and those in class eight and Form Four can’t wait to sit for final exams and finally say ‘hurray! I’ve made it!’
Back to school is just another stepping stone towards the other divide free from morning preps, gruesome porridge and harsh teachers.
9. Escape from Pokot
Not all kids find home a safe haven filled with milk, honey, Nickelodeon and lots of food.
Those from Pokot where the cattle rustler’s pangas and riffles produce havoc, food is a luxury and they will always look forward to boarding schools where food and security is guarantee.
10. My teacher, my crush
Some boys and girls have a crush on certain teachers and they can’t wait to stare at them and laugh sheepishly at their jokes.
Anxiety sits at the depth of your child’s stomach like an undigested meal, and most can’t wait for school to resume so he or she can be reunited with their crush!
