I was blocked from attending my husband's funeral

A 34-year-old widow who lost her husband of 12 years late last year is yet to come to terms with the fact that she did not participate in his burial.

Winfred Wanjiru Kariuki recounted how relatives of her late husband John Kabue Ndegwa buried him in haste at 6 am without a ceremony or a mass despite the deceased being a staunch Catholic.

The late Kabue had sired two boys with Wanjiru aged 12 and 9 years and they too did not bury their father. In fact, the boys are yet to believe that their father died.

He was buried at his parents’ home in Gikondi, Mukurwe-ini, but had lived with his family in Nyeri town where he was a businessman.

“I was informed by a neighbour that they buried my husband at 6 am and that there was a heavy contingent of police officers, who had been deployed by my in-laws ostensibly to block me from accessing the venue,” says Wanjiru.

She waited until about 3 pm when she was informed that police officers had left and she embarked on a journey to pay her last respects to her husband together with her two children.

“We had bought a wreath, which we placed on his grave before I recited prayers and asked God to receive my husband in heaven,” says the widow.

She says she was at pains to explain to her children why they did not attend their father’s burial ceremony, when he got sick and why there were no photos and relatives at the grave site.

“To date, they do not believe that their father died, they claim I was only tricking them when I accompanied them to place a wreath on the grave, which they claim is not their father’s,” recounts Wanjiru.

She says the burial was the anti-climax of her life. She got married to the man of her dreams in strict adherence with customary laws and the bride price was paid to her parents on April 24, 2009.

After the controversial burial, another shocker greeted Wanjiru at Kenyatta University Mortuary and Funeral Home where she had gone to enquire about the process of getting a death certificate.

The morgue attendants informed her that Kabue’s body had been removed from the morgue on December 7, a day before his rushed burial ceremony on December 8.

It is still unclear where the body was for over 14 hours before the funeral took place.

Although she admits their marriage was not a bed of roses, she says they stuck together and shared a home they had bought in Nyeri town.

Wanjiru says she had taken him to court to compel him to cater for the children’s school fees, but quickly adds this still didn’t water down their resolve to stay in the union. “In all the period that I filed a petition in court, we lived in our home and could accompany each other while going to court. It was no big deal to us because we agreed to disagree and disagreed to agree,” says the widow.

Kabue, 52, operated a business in the city. He visited Nairobi every once in a while but always went back home, claims Wanjiru.

On November 5 last year, she says he left home as usual but never went back as he always did. 

Two days later, she received a call from a friend from his village consoling her over Kabue’s death.

“I later learnt that he was involved in a road accident. I travelled to Nairobi the following day and found out that his relatives had already informed the police at Kasarani Station that the deceased was not married.

“The officers advised me to visit the KU morgue. I wasn’t allowed to view his body and was told that there was another person who had been registered as his wife. This marked the beginning of my woes,” recounts Wanjiru.

As she later learnt, her in-laws recognised the other woman as their son’s wife and wanted nothing to do with her. 

“They later said his property would be divided into three portions as he had three wives. This includes our house where we lived with my husband before his death,” says Wanjiru.

A letter to kick start Kabue’s succession process and seen by the Nairobian from Gathuitu chief and addressed to the Registrar of the High Court indicates that the deceased had three wives; namely Asumpta Muthoni Wairimu, Winfred Wanjiru Kariuki, and Dorcas Njeri Kamau.

The letter acknowledges that Wanjiru and Njeri had two and three children, respectively, while Muthoni had none.

Wanjiru is now at a crossroads. She says she can’t afford a lawyer to challenge the succession plan.  

“We bought and developed the plot where I live with my children with my late husband. I can’t access the proceeds from his business and my two children have dropped out of school. I have also been receiving threats from unknown people,” she says.

She is now appealing to organisations that defend the rights of widows to help her get justice.