I am too beautiful to be single: Betty Bayo speaks on the Kanyari saga

When you meet her, don’t ask her about Pastor Victor Kanyari. She has moved on and so should you. She is relishing her freedom and revelling in her new-found love.

I spot her in the midst of a laid back troupe. Musicians, I later learn, and quite an interesting mix, some with turbans on their heads and other pious looking ones trading wise cracks.

A jolly bunch. She is dressed down in a pink top and denim jeans, and she cuts quite a picture of radiance and youthfulness.

In fact, one would say she looks like a different woman altogether, confident and assured. Not quite like a deer caught in the headlights as seen in her TV interviews following a 2014 Jicho Pevu expose’.

She was caught in the centre of a media storm surrounding her then husband and Pastor Victor Kanyari, who was allegedly scamming the faithful. I am here to meet Betty Bayo, the illustrious musician whose stellar reputation was marred by the purported misdoings of her ex-husband.

She has since moved on, and she isn’t going to be dragged back into the mess, she tells me in an exasperated tone. And since I want an interview, I am ready to play the dance

“People want to know,” I explain. And I can see her caving, maybe worn down by the hunger journalists wear so well. “OK. The last media interview I will ever do on the matter,” she promises, settling into the interview.

But why? Victor is still a part of your life.

Well, he once told me to stop talking about him. He said I should tell anyone who asked me questions about him to call his office line and talk to him directly. That I should talk about my music, not him. But it is not just about him, and I do not want to act in that role anymore. It is not funny.

I get many questions because he does not respond to queries. So I want this role to end with this interview. Anybody who wants to know anything about him, kindly ask him. When I go on TV to talk about my music and people ask about him, I end up in a dilemma, not knowing what to say. I don’t want that anymore.

So let’s get it out of the way then. What was going through your mind watching the expose’ on TV?

There was a power blackout in my home on that day. And I did not watch it. Still haven’t.

Not even a teeny weeny bit curious?

I deserve to save my data bundles for things that entertain me. And this is in the least bit not entertaining. Why would I watch it? I already know what was on it because everyone told me about it. And it is a sad story.

Were you shocked by the allegations?

Not in the least bit. I had gone through so much with him that I was just indifferent.

When you have gone through so much, stretched beyond your limits as a human being, you easily snap. I was not shocked. I was not expecting anything better than that. Are you Victor Kanyari’s wife?

But you have children together and lived together at some point...

You know what? I can’t really tell what life with him was like. We were both very busy people. Technically, we lived together for three years, but in reality that could be just one year.

I was always at my mum’s place having ran away for one thing or the other. When it all blew up, we were living separately, but hadn’t decided to end it.

Did the relationship end completely after the story broke?

I did not leave him immediately. It didn’t feel right to me to leave him in the mess. So I held on a little longer. And I had to forgive him. When I saw he was stable enough, I decided to leave. He had changed and become a better person but in my heart nothing would stop me from leaving.

You co-parent?

Yes we do. But I haven’t seen him for the last two years. But our children, aged two and five, have a good relationship with him. We have an arrangement that works for us. While I have my personal feelings about him and what our relationship was like, his children don’t have to know or be affected by that.

Are you seeing anyone?

Yes I am. And I am happy. If it works out or not, I will still be happy. I will still be Betty. I am wiser now. I do not cling to relationships. It is only that I am too beautiful to be single.

Has your musical career been affected by the drama?

People thought that the fiasco would be the end of my career, but my fans never left me. They stood by me throughout the whole ordeal and I thank them because I emerged stronger. Before the incident, I never used to have musicians as friends, but after it happened the music fraternity came together to support me without judging me and now they are my closest friends. I have been slow to release songs because I had to take care of my child, but I am now in a position to focus more on producing and I will be releasing music soon

What did the whole fiasco teach you?

Today, I don’t live in regrets. The information and the experience that I have can help somebody else. Sometimes you go through something for the sake of others. I thank God I did not learn my mistake when I was old. Some people realise that they made a mistake when they are 60. Can you imagine realising that you have been living with the wrong person for the last 40 years?

What is in your future?

I am in the throes of starting some businesses. I will continue working on my music and going back to school to finish my Psychology degree.

Parting shot?

I will be a happy mother and a happy girl this year. Watch me