Our governors need to roll in style

By Michael Mwai

Africa and its people are amazing. We are no less than any other society in the world. If anything, Kenya is the ‘cradle of mankind’ and, therefore, superior in every way.

Next year, we shall celebrate Cape Town as the World Design Capital. That is another milestone for Africa and while we have had many other firsts, I think it is time for Nairobi and Kenya to shine.

Our new leadership is largely young, tech savvy and dynamic. If they stick to their promise to deliver change in a digital world, we will surely go global, fast.

Let us shift gear and dream big as we prepare to prosper. When we have all worked hard and achieved much, we must spoil ourselves, and that includes living large.

A good place to start is to imagine driving the new 2013 Rolls Royce Wraith. Never heard of it? Look it up on your smart phone. Don’t have one? Drop your mulika mwizi into the next water closet and go get yourself a web-friendly handset.

To live a quality life free of self-doubt and mediocrity, you must work smart and dream big. Why should you be content with the filth, rot and potholes that riddle our counties?

Judging by the vehicle the Nairobi governor drove to his inauguration, he is thinking big. I believe that we are on our way to a bright future. The Rolls Royce is arguably the world’s most coveted automobile in terms of combined performance, luxury and sheer class.

I want to commend those that have dared to import exotic vehicles like the Aston Martin, Bentley and Lamborghini. I also want to urge the governor of my great city to embark on making Nairobi the next design capital of the world. He must also be brave enough to upgrade his ride and be the first to drive a ‘brand new’ Rolls Royce. Here is why.

Finest technology

Susan, the first lady of Nairobi, must be treated to only the finest in automotive technology. Rolls Royce is the ultimate in refinement, opulence and bespoke luxury.

For a hands-on man like him, this vehicle is perfect as it has been hand-built. It takes up to 60 pairs of hands and more than 450 hours to design, construct and craft each vehicle using only first-rate materials.

The car’s gleaming body is the result of at least five coats of paint, seven if you go for the two-tone design. Between each layer highly trained technicians sand it down by hand. After the final coat, there are five hours of hand polishing to achieve that glassy effect. The coach line drawn across its side takes three hours to apply using squirrel- and ox-hair brushes.

Will our governor go for a black, red or orange Rolls? Well, he can have any colour he wishes for you can order your Rolls Royce in any pigment you choose.

On the inside, there is fine wood from France crafted by the most skilled cabinetmakers. All veneers are sourced from one log so that the grain detailing is mirrored across the inside of the vehicle.

The leather will not be from a starving cow from our semi-arid areas, but that of an Alpine bull grazed on plush meadows with no thorny bushes in sight. There are 450 leather parts in a Rolls Royce Phantom and each has been laser cut and handstitched.

Perfect weekend car

Our governor is the most powerful man in the city, so he must drive the most powerful Rolls Royce ever built. The new Wraith has 624bhp V12 and manages 800Nm of torque from as early as 1500rpm. This should make it the perfect weekend car for Mr Kidero. It will dash from 0-100kph in 4.6 seconds. That means our governor will never be late and neither will he hold up traffic.

Its engine is mated to an eight-speed automatic ZF transmission. This allows it to waft over any imperfections that might have skipped the attention of the city engineer. The suspension has been tuned to minimise body roll and amplify feedback when cornering.

This is a car Bwana Governor will want to drive himself. The steering is heavier at high speed and lighter during low city driving and parking. He will never have to worry about changing road conditions. Using GPS data, the vehicle ‘sees’ beyond the driver and knows when a junction is coming up or it the terrain is different, and changes gears and the suspension settings in anticipation.

When I sat in the larger Rolls Royce, what wowed me most was the roof lining. More than 1,600 fibre optic lamps hand-woven into the roof lining transform the interior ambience. At the flick of a switch, I was enjoying the effect of a romantic starry sky.

You must be thinking: We are still a developing country steeped in poverty, unemployment, floods and crime. True; but does that mean we cannot wish for better, dream and aspire for more?

I choose the Rolls Royce because it seems unattainable. I choose the Rolls Royce ‘Ghost’ because it would be the perfect addition to the fleet as the new governor gets rid the few remaining ‘ghost’ workers at the council and helps our city regain its lost glory.