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In one of the many Facebook groups where I am a member, a woman put up a post about a scuffle she had with her sister-in-law (SIL). Apparently, this lady’s SIL has brought her child for a sleepover at her house without informing the lady of the house. She only informed the lady’s hubby, who is her brother.

Most women responding to this post were of the view that indeed the SIL crossed the line. I can directly relate to the experience of this mama because I also have a SIL from hell.

Mine is the type who looks for trouble from you by all means just to hurt and annoy you. She is the type who gets to your skin and lights a fire inside there.

I remember before I got married to my husband and we had gone to meet the larger family for the first time, she started with me on a very wrong footing, she declared war with me from day one.

“By the way I hope you know that our big bro (my hubby) has been living with our kid bro. So please when you get married, do not dare kick him out because you found him there,” she warned me. And not one to be easily bullied and to show her who calls the shots in my home, when I got married I diplomatically did exactly that.

I tactfully convinced my husband to rent an SQ in the neighbourhood for the college going boy to allow us have time to bond as newly-weds. And to support my argument, I reminded him how we had been told in pre-marital classes that as newly-weds we should avoid hosting live-in guests for at least one year.

My SIL’s wars never ended there. My SIL still comes to my house unannounced and the only person who is aware is the house girl.

For some weird reason, she always develops a rapport with all my house girls so that they can leak to her whatever information she needs. She has even made me fire some house girls who turned against me and sided with her.

At one point she brainwashed one of my maids telling her that I was paying her so little yet I could afford more. She even incited the house girl to a go-slow until I increased her salary.

I fired the girl. I am lucky that my current house girl knows that I am her boss and she owes her allegiance to me.

Because of SILs dramas, I rarely call her. She also rarely calls me unless there is some quarrel she wants to pick with me. Actually when I see her call coming through, I shudder, “Now what does she want?”

I usually ignore her calls and ask my husband to call back and find out what she wants.

During my early years of marriage, she almost gave me ulcers and high blood pressure but now that I am settled in my marriage and I know my place, I just ignore her and when need be, I deal with her head on.