Casanova masquerading as exorcist meets his water loo

By HAMZA BABU

KENYA: Here at the Coast, demons and ghosts and individuals getting possessed is a reality.

We have so many walking vessels of vicious demons. And we have, over the years, learned how to placate the evil spirits, so that the unfortunate individuals can exist in relative peace.

Rituals are held, goats and black cocks slaughtered. Offerings of gold and silver are given to tame the malevolent beasts residing inside some of our brothers and sisters.

However, it is not always that the spirits act up; I suppose they are always sleeping most of the time. Amazingly, some of the genies are said to be at least a thousand years old.

There is a little problem of individuals pretending to be possessed and attempt to get away with crimes or satisfy a craving.

Vile

We recently had a case where one of my customers, Amin whose wife is feared to harbour a most vile demon by the name of ‘Makata’ (the shredder) misbehaves and blames it all on the spirit.

Her husband who knows nothing about the characteristics of the beasts, had no clue he was being taken for a ride.

Therefore, his colleagues at Kahawa Tungu decided to spill the beans and tell him the truth about his missus.

It was, of course, one of those breezy evenings when the dark liquid tastes heavenly with everyone admiring the spectacular sunset where the ocean meets the sky.

No one was complaining when Muhsin suddenly shifted his chair close to where Amin was seated. Muhsin requested Amin to have a word with him in private.

“Sheikh, you can tell me whatever it is you need to say, right here as I am surrounded by friends and have no secrets,” retorted Amin.

Well then, with that gallant declaration, Muhsin had no choice but to spill the beans.

“You know, that ‘Makata’ tormenting your wife is fake!” he began, and immediately everyone became silent.

The change in Amin was quite spectacular, as the man who had predominant Arabic light complexion quickly turned red all over, and began seething with rage.

“Are you saying you are more knowledgeable about djinns than Usatdh Aboud who exorcises my wife whenever she acts up?” he asked.

Affair

“What I’m saying is that Ustadh Aboud and your wife are having an affair. They use the djinn as an excuse to get together.

 “And what is more, you are paying the man who is having a good time with your wife,” Muhsin revealed.

With that, Habib was an inch away from having a heart attack. So many other adherents of Kahawa Tungu confirmed that indeed Aboud was a quack.

So after convincing the guy that he needed to stand up for the sake of all the husbands in the region, he hurried home where he declared henceforth, there would be no more gold, black chickens sacrifices or Ustadh Aboud for his wife and her spirit Makata.

“If Makata wants drama, he will have to reckon with me” Amin muttered.