There comes a time when a man must just have his peace of mind. During such a time, the man must just be left to his own thoughts. Neither questioned nor excited. Neither bothered nor entertained.
Everybody deserves this once in a while, whether or not they are mean. Whether or not they are a people’s person. Whether or not they owe you something, like an apology or love. And don’t give me the “I’m your partner and I deserve your attention” crap.
So, after a close observation of myself, I have discovered some things which, when you see me do, you should never, interrupt me. It is good that most probably you will never meet me.
1. Writing
Well, this is a no-brainer. No writer appreciates a person or activity that intercepts his or her flow of thoughts. If there are, then they must be very few; an extremely insignificant number. And, while I claim no special recognition for any notable contribution in the flooded literary world, I feel compelled to claim that I have the bragging rights as a writer, by virtue of this piece.
And so, when you see me with my head bend toward a blank page and an ink-starved pen cradled between my right thumb, index and middle fingers, the last thing you want to do is punctuate my thoughts with your gossip, however urgent.
I have a highly volatile memory. Once an idea flickers in one of the dark corners of my mind, my next impulse is to want to capture it. If fail to, it will never visit me again. And while I am at it, I don’t stop to consider if it is ‘worth it’ or not; at least not at that moment. And living in a world as noisy as this one- where information of all kind hits you from all directions- chances of forgetting my ‘brilliant’ ideas are very high. I bet you do not want to contribute to this already tough situation.
2. Listening to music.
Music is a detergent to the soul- or whatever it is that experiences relief (and release) whenever your favorite track comes on. Music cuts it bare, washes clean every nook and cranny of it, hangs it out to dry, then stitches it up back together. And it works best uninterrupted- either internally or externally. What’s more, this process is as anesthetic as it is therapeutic. No pain, but lots of gain!
Listening to music is like going to a confession. It is like admitting your flaws and not feeling guilty about it. Music recognizes you have an ego that must be accorded similar or better respect than a live electricity cable. It assuages it, reducing the ‘guilt’ of being weak to an immeasurable pleasure.
And it doesn’t matter what genre you listen to. If it touches your soul, the magic outdoes the obsession with genres. Is this the point where you throw in that “music is your religion” line, especially now that I am a proud atheist?
The wheat in this whole universe of chaff is that, should you see me with earphones on, you must never interrupt the session. You have no idea what is going on in there, but it is one I wouldn’t trade for anything.
3. Solitude
A man’s brain works best when he is alone. He gets better visions when he is left to his own devices. Solitude gives him perspectives. Ideas. Thoughts. Answers to endless questions that bombard him on the daily, trivial or not. You might wonder why folks meditate. Here is the thing, stop wondering and start meditating. Nothing beats first-hand experiences.
I will use this as a note to my future ex (wife of girlfriend): the reason we broke up most probably is that you just couldn’t get off my case. You always hung on my neck, and assumed that each time I sat all by myself in the study, I nursed my fears in silence.
So, if you wish that we never get to that point, acknowledge and respect my desire for solitude. I cannot think about the world when your presence hovers around mine like a ghost.
On a lighter note though, there comes that point in time when all you need is to be in tune with your inner thoughts, and just be you. This is nothing much to ask of the world, is it?
