Mwau's travails and parable of loose-tongued boy and leopard

By Peter Kimani

With his shock of white hair and beards, John Harun Mwau looks like a genial old man, a Santa Claus of sorts.

Actually, Mwau is also generous to fault, which is why a bunch of councillors from his Kilome constituency made their maiden trip out of the country on his account.

I am presuming, of course, that their much-publicised trip to Dubai many moons ago, did materialise.

I’m not insinuating Mwau is a man to break his word. Far from it. Actually, the events of the past week confirm he is a man who keeps his word.

After crying for weeks that his life was in danger, apparently without convincing anyone, his prophetic words rang powerfully true. It was confirmed that, indeed, with no sense of irony, Mwau was in serious danger – from his driver and bodyguard.

Why, barely after Mwau stepped out of his limo to go for dinner, the two staged an ambush in the night, the crack of gunfire lighting city streets.

Now, since we do not know whether firing rounds was part of their job description, we can only thank God Mwau was not in the vehicle when the crazy duo went to work.

It is my fervent hope that the two are out of a job for putting Mwau’s name into disrepute, and risking his life with reckless shooting at his vehicle.

But since I’m an optimist, Mwau should look at the brighter side of things. He should be pleased about having empathetic staff, the sort that catch a cold when The Boss sneezes. Using that analogy, the driver and the bodyguard must have seen it fit to dramatise Mwau’s imminent dangers by demonstrating how possible it was for assassins, especially the white ones that Mwau has been hallucinating about, to cut him down with their big guns.

Now Mwau should have a good night sleep after the US confirmation that they have been trailing him, not for weeks or months, but years, so his suspicions were right.

Still, I’m persuaded Mwau is old enough to have lived in the age of fireside stories, and no doubt recalls the story of the little, cheeky boy and the leopard.

Finding the solitude of the grazing fields unbearable, the boy invented a clever way of marshalling villagers to his side. He would shout at the full volume of his lungs about a leopard pouncing on his father’s large flock.

Twice, villagers raced to his rescue, only for him to smile and admit he was only pulling a leg. When the big cat finally arrived, villagers said dismissively: “Oh, it is is that leopard boy pulling a leg.”

Mwau would do well to narrate this story to his bodyguard and driver before they pull the trigger... again!