Why I married my Ex

She was washing the dishes.

He grabbed her from behind and held her so close.

He kissed her neck.

She stopped washing the dishes and felt his lips on her.

"I love you" he told her.

"I know you do, your actions speak of love and I love you too" she told him as she turned to face him.

"I advised our son to make up with his girlfriend" he told her.

"I hope those two patch things up. His girlfriend is a nice girl, it was petty of them to argue about who calls and texts more than the other, more petty to break up because of that" she said.

"They are young. When people are young they tend to make silly and selfish decisions. They don't see the big picture, they only see their current feelings of hurt. We were there once. Foolish. We almost blew this love we have" he told her kissing her nose.

She smiled, "I can't believe you once were my ex. I can't believe there was a time I swore never to talk to you; and look at us now, happily married, with three amazing children. Life is so interesting"

He gently laughed, " I know, right! Though our break up wasn't because of petty arguments"

"No it wasn't, at that moment I felt hurt. I hated how you made me feel, how you would praise other women and make me feel like a hidden shadow. You made me feel like I was competing with your work, your parents and friends. I felt drained by how you misused finances. I struggled to break up with you, but at the time, I felt I had to" she told him stroking his arms, with his hands around her waist.

"I misunderstood you. I thought all I needed to do was be your man, but you needed my time and attention, you needed me to be responsible. You too made loving you so hard. You kept things to yourself. You didn't open up to me. You used other men to make me feel jealous. You confused me, sometimes you would be hot towards me, then suddenly you grow cold. Your words to me were harsh. You pushed me away. It's like you did wrong deliberately so that I be the one who breaks up with you and look like the bad one" he said.

She laughed, "I was foolish and indecisive. I put you through so much hell. My temper was crazy"

He laughed with her, "We were young"

"Why did you not give up on me despite all that drama? Why did you not let me go?" she asked.

"Because love never gives up. Because no matter how young and foolish I was, I was wise enough to know that no other woman in the world suits me like you. Yes, you kept annoying me, you kept pushing me away; but I needed you. I believed in the wife in you even though you didn't see her. Plus I genuinely loved you then just as I love you now. I was determined to get you back. I was scared of us drifting apart. I was scared of losing you to another man, another man kissing you, another man having you, making love to you, building the dreams of a family that I had with you. Our break up scared me. I had to fight for us" he told her.

"I am glad you fought for me my warrior. I tried hard not to let you back into my life, but you never left my heart. I could see honesty in your effort and you changed for the better, you started to love me the way I want to be loved. You matured. Next thing I knew, I was telling you how much I love you, letting my guard down, laughing with you, kissing you" she smiled.

"If only couples could learn to be patient with each other. We live in a generation where we don't want to wait, we break up and divorce too easily; failing to realize that love is a long term investment. A generation that quits too easily and makes irrational decisions based on temporary feelings. Love has seasons. There are so many single people in this world who regret letting go of someone in their life who was their best chance at love. They regret jumping out of a good relationship or marriage too soon. Imagine if we were impatient and remained exes, we would have missed out all this" he spoke.

"Mom, dad; I am going out" their son interrupted them.

"Where are you going son?" she asked.

"For a date with my girlfriend. We've made up and we're back together, so we're going for a movie date to celebrate" said the son.

"That's lovely son. Have fun, make sure you give her a nice tight hug" she said.

Their son started walking away smiling.

Love is patient. If you have a good relationship/marriage, don't give up on it no matter how much work it needs. Love is a journey, fight for it!

© Dayan Masinde and Akello Oliech

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